(Closed) Google has no answer for me! Wording??

posted 5 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
256 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

@2littleslauren : Interesting! I had never actually thought about this before, even if I’m pretty much doing the same thing. My fiance and I will be doing the legal paperwork beforehand and then getting married in a church a week later. But, even with our legal papers signed, we aren’t really considering ourselves “married”, because we consider the church wedding to be the “true” marriage. So, I guess it depends on your personal beliefs on when the actual marriage is taking place!

And, if you do decide to write “exchange vows” i think it would be perfectly fine! It doesn’t strike me as cold and impersonal at all… I see it on invitations all the time; it sounds totally appropriate and romantic, even. 🙂

Post # 4
Member
346 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

My sister had the exact same thing.  They married a year before their actual wedding for mortgage and insurance.  They worded their invitation just like they hadn’t been married.  Nobody in our family knew except me and my parents and only BIL’s sister knew on his side.  It stayed like that until 2 months before the church wedding when he came clean to his parents.  I don’t think you need to change wording or disclose that youve already signed the marriage license.

Post # 5
Member
9955 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

As per The Post Institute of Etiquette (and their Book… Wedding Etiquette by Peggy Post)

When a couple Host their own Wedding:

(A)

Beth Holland and Christopher Saladino

invite you to attend

their marriage on

Saturday, teh twenty-ninth of October

two thousand

at half after three o’clock

etc

OR (B) when a couple have been living together, the less formal…

Mary Ann Schmidt

and

George James MacLellan

invite you to share with them

the joy of their marriage

Saturday, the tenth of July

nineteen hundred and ninety-nine

at half after four o’clock

First Congregation Church

Baton Rouge, Louisiana

R.S.V.P.

I like the (B) Example in your situation, as it doesn’t outright imply that the event is the Exchange of Vows for the first time… it can if you will sort of “fudge” the truth a bit (seeing as you seem self conscious enough to have asked this Question).  The words here just convey you are celebrating your marriage… which you are.

Not that it really matters… because honestly most folks aren’t so up on Etiquette that they’d ever notice what version you’ve included in the Invites anyhow… they’ll just be thrilled for the 2 of you, and are happy you thought to include them in your BIG DAY

Hope this helps,

PS… Note the capitalization, punctuation and grammar… I’ve copied everything here exactly as it should appear.  If you need more help, you can drop me a PM with your particular details … and I can give you the low-down on that part of setting up your Printed Invites (lol the book has every scenario imaginable)

 

Post # 7
Member
85 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Our wedding is June 22nd, and we ended up getting legally married last year. For us it was needed, but we still wanted to continue the big event. At first we were just going to tell our intermediate family, but since we have two sisters that have big mouths-the secret was spilled. Now that some time went by I’m really happy we just put it out there. It would have been awful living a lie for so long in front of loved ones. So we are just wording ours still as our “Wedding”, but also as our Vow renewal.

 

 

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