Post # 1
So my cousin graduated from graduate school in early May. I was not invited to the graduation and if there was a party I wasn’t invited to that. Then she came to my wedding where I heard all about graduation. No big.
So today I get this card announcing that she’s a candidate for graduation and that her friends and family are invited to the graduation on the ___ May, 2014 at ___. I think it’s just an announcement even though it reads like an invitation?
Why did I get this? I knew she graduated! Obviously I’m not invited to the party/ceremony that occured 7 weeks ago. So what’s up? Am I supposed to get a gift? I hate all this etiquette stuff.
Post # 2
I wonder if it got lost in the mail or missed being mailed to you? It sounds like you were invited to attend her gradutation and somehow it arrived to you late.
Post # 3
I don’t think you have to do anything if you don’t want to. Their just announcing a milestone.
If you’re not sure, you could send a “congratulations” card. Those are simple and inexpensive, but also meaningful if you are sincere about the message the card is sending.
Post # 4
- Wedding: April 2013 - A court...
My first thought was it sounds like it got lost in the mail too. Makes no sense to just announce that she graduated after the fact.
Post # 5
audrey_lane: If the date on the envelope is after the graduation, it would seem that it is either:
- a souvenir she thinks you may want (although I can’t fathom why she would think you would want one, when she didn’t think it would be important enough to send you the invitation on time)
- or, a blatant solicitation for a gift.
In the event, that it was truly delayed in the mail, then it was what it appears to be- an invitation to the ceremonies.
Post # 6
Announcements worded like that are generally send prior to the event, inviting you to come celebrate. So, my first thought is if this was delayed in transit, so you received it very late. The other possibility is that this is simply an announcement of her graduation, in which case the wording should have been changed to something like “We are exctied to announc that on May 11, Suzy Bee graduated from ….” Either way, I woudl send a congratulatory card. If you would like to send a gift, that would be nice, but not necessary.
Post # 7
ok so her facebook status from two days ago states that she was doing graduation announcements so it was obviously not intended to arrive prior to the graduation.
I texted my brother and asked him if he got one and he said this cousin had texted him last Thursday asking for his address so she could send a graduation announcement. I’ve never seen an announcement like this. I am confused.
Post # 8
audrey_lane: It sounds like they’re being cheap and using leftover party invitations as graduation announcements. Whether it’s that or something else, it’s just an announcement.
Post # 9
Well I heard there was no graduation party, just my grandparents and one aunt/uncle were invited to the graduation itself. The thing that is weird to me i guess is that we all know she graduated and in fact she got a special shout out and toast at my wedding! I’m super proud of her but I don’t want feel a gift is necessary. I did not gift other cousins that didn’t send the announcement and i hate to think of it as a ploy that “worked” leaving other cousins left out. I always give a gift if i get an invitation to a party and my aunt knows that. If there was a party and I didn’t make the “cut” that’s cool too. We aren’t SUPER close. But that means I don’t feel obligated to gift. I will send a nice card and see what happens.
Post # 10
I don’t understand sending graduation/wedding announcements at all. FMIL doesn’t want to invite any of her cousins to the wedding because she knows they won’t come, but wants to send them announcements after the fact. I think that is the most gift-grabby thing I’ve ever heard of. I’m thinking of sending them an invite anyway so at least they feel included (and we aren’t embarrassed when we see them every year at Thanksgiving), regardless of if they can come or not. FMIL told me that my idea is even more gift grabby than an announcement.
Post # 11
graduation announcements are exactly the same as engagement or marriage announcements, except instead of announcung a life decision you made, a simple choice, you are announcing the successful completion of years of study and work. Graduations are a big deal. Many people mail announcements because it is traditional to congratulate a new grad with a card and monetary gift. so it def can be read as a cash grab, but no less so than an engagement or marriage announcement.
Post # 12
ohnatto: I thought the exact same thing. This is no different than sending an engagement announcement.
Post # 13
I didn’t send an engagement announcement and never sent a graduation announcement. However I had a party for my graduation and sent out invitations. I did not have an engagement party and felt no need for an announcement.
But I just gave the card to my husband who said it’s not an announcement and is clearly an invitation. It has a date, time and location.
Post # 14
Graduation announcements aren’t even a thing here thank goodness (or parties for that matter). No one but maybe the parents/grandparents would think to give a gift or card for it!
Post # 15
audrey_lane: when I graduated high school I sent out announcements to all aunts, uncles, and close family friends. people sent back cards with money or presents for college. it is very common in my area to do that. Most of my friends did that for college, but i didn’t simply because I was getting married 6 months after graduation and didn’t want people to feel pressured to give me gifts for both occasions.
im thinking that is what she is doing, but she made the mistake of sending them out after her gradiatuib and she used the invites instead of having announcements made. At this point it sounds gift grabby. Did she do this for high school or undergrad?