Gran hasn't RSVPd

posted 2 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 2
Member
1043 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

I would just gracefully say that you heard she may not be able to make it and explain to her how important she is and it is that she is there for you 

Post # 3
Member
495 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

I’d say call and ask, you need your final numbers ext. If gran doesn’t want to tell you why she wouldn’t, at least you would know if she is coming or not, then you can tackle the whispers.

Post # 4
Member
1310 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2015 - St Peter's Church, East Maitland, and Bella Vista, Newcastle

I would definitely call her and ask her if she’s planning to come.

Post # 5
Member
3632 posts
Sugar bee

Some older people think and say funny things. She may not handle larger crowds very well, and if she’s afraid of people whispering behind her back, she may be suffering from paranoia.

We’re at the other extreme; my MIL RSVPd to my daughter’s wedding 3 times. When the FOB talked to her on the phone, she shrieked “Of course I don’t want the vegetarian entree!” Then she sent two nasty e-mails to the bride, with her meal choice a 2nd and 3rd time, telling her how upset she was that some distant/estranged relatives weren’t invited, because she thinks  weddings should be family reunions.   

 

Post # 6
Member
5032 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2012

I would call her and make sure she’s okay first of all . .it sounds like this is unusual behavior for her?

 

Post # 8
Member
195 posts
Blushing bee

It sounds like either something is going on with her personally or perhaps some family politics you don’t know about. Either way, it doesn’t sound at all like this is about you, so I would try not to feel hurt by it. Like the previous Bees, I would suggest calling her (or visiting her if it’s possible?) and gently get a better idea of what’s going on

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