Post # 1
Recently engaged with a really tight budget, my fiancé and I have started looking at some places to get married.
My fiancé stumbled a website yesterday : a barn only 20mins away from where we would have the ceremony with a gorgeous view on the mountains.
We called and asked if we could visit the venue and of course we fell in love with the whole thing.
The thing is : it’s way out of our budget. To be honest, we don’t have much of a budget to begin with but this location is breathtaking (to us, at least).
So here is my question Bees : we don’t know yet if our parents are going to help us a bit with our expenses so I’m not counting on that just yet but would you wait another year to save money and get the venue you really, really like ?
My fiancé and I have been together for almost 7 years now so being engaged for 2 years doesn’t seem like a big deal to me but I’m also very eager to get married next year.
What would YOU do ? Staying engaged for 2 years and saving money or getting married next year with a small budget and a more “common” venue ?
Thank you all in advance for your replies ! 🙂
Post # 3
- Wedding: September 2011 - Bent Creek Winery (Livermore, California); Reception: Family Residence (San Ramon, California)
When DH and I first got engaged, we were planning on getting married a year and nine months later. Then we bumped up our wedding by an entire year, and I couldn’t have imagined it any other way. I think I would have gone crazy planning for that long! Plus, I was just ready to be married already.
Personally, I couldn’t survive a two year engagement, so I would try to find something more affordable. But that’s just my opinion – there are plenty of people who are engaged for two years and are just fine. I think it comes down to what you want and can handle!
Post # 4
- Wedding: November 2011 - Florida Aquarium
We booked our dream venue, even knowing that it was really out of our budget at the time. DH had a horrible part time job, and I had a salaried position. Our rent was outrageous, and we were already saving as much as we could each month for the wedding. We booked the venue 9 months out- my dad wanted to help, but couldn’t offer a whole lot, so he covered the deposit (basically the venue fee). He really wanted us to have our dream wedding. At 6 months out, DH got his dream job, and we were able to make it work. We did use a credit card for some of the expenses, but it’s paid off now. We’re glad that we went with our dream venue and had a year engagement. We got married after six years, and there’s no way I wanted to wait longer.
Post # 5
You have to make your own decisions on your priorities, but I would not spend a year of my life waiting around for a barn – or any building/venue. It’s more important to me to be married to FI, and to have a wedding we can afford.
Post # 6
Thanks Bees !
That’s the thing : I change my mind every minute ! lol One minute, I’m fine with saving money and getting married in 2014 and the other, I’m just like “Wait a minute, NOT happening ! I’ve been waiting for too long !” lol
Maybe I should just wait and see what our parents say ? If they can help us a little, we could consider 2013 I guess…
Again, thank you ladies ! 🙂
Post # 7
@KCKnd2: Totally agreed, that’s why I’m so hesitant.
Maybe I’m just being too excited about the whole thing, I just need to calm down ! lol
Thanks for your reply !
Post # 8
I don’t have advice, but I stumbled across a beautiful barn and was FLOORED at the cost of it. It was like $4500 and included NOTHING but the venue. I guess barns are the new ‘it’ things around me or something, but I could never pay that much for just a venue. $4500 could get me a freaking football stadium.. 😉
Post # 9
@MsAmandaAnn: LOL ! I totally get your point. Our venue is “only” $1,900 but it’s still a lot for us.
Thanks for your input though ! 🙂
Post # 10
I decided NOT to go with the dream venue and wait another year to get married. I wanted to get married this year and we just looked around for more budget friendly venues we could afford now.
If you really feel your parents will help, let them know your dilemma without coming outright and asking for money. Say: wow, we found a venue we love but we’re going to have to wait 2 years to save up for it. Wish we could just be married next year but with our budget the way it is, we have to wait.
They might offer from there to chip in, ask for more info or agree that you should wait. In that case, you get your answer… you can get married nnext year with your parents help or wait until 2014.
Post # 11
when FI and I got engaged, we were plannnig on zero money from our parents, so that, combined with our work schedules and no place in StL being available lead us to plan on a two year (to the day) engagement. Since that’s happened, we got two unexpected and generous gifts from my parents and his grandparents….but I’m still glad we’ve got a two year engagement. At this point we’re down to….21 months, and I’m just now getting the itch to plan (and I was definitely the girl who had everything planned out way prior to engagement). It’s awesome because we’re meeting with a couple photographers and venues over the next few months instead of having to cram it all in a week. There is no stress surrounding the planning. it’s great.
Post # 12
I had a similar situation to this where I thought I found my dream venue too. In my case, it was a lodge in front of a gorgeous lake with rolling hills as the backdrop.
However, it was too much out of our budget and I continued my search elsewhere. As I explored other venues and got deeper into the planning process, I realized that every venue seems to have it’s own separate set of charms (and cons) and the loss of my “perfect venue” was easier to cope with over time.
So I say continue searching and exploring other potential sites. Who knows, maybe your dream venue will be 3 searches further down the line. If your heart is still settled on this place, I think that a lot of the advice posted above are all pretty solid too.
Post # 13
you have two options give up something else or keep looking.
I had a huge issue finding a venue for the ceremony- our reception is a free venue and i was almost thinking we’d have to have them at the same spot ( something I really did not want!)
so we kept looking everythin was way above our budget.
all together my budget is 2,500 ish give or take a little more as FI and I have a little more each month to spend.
I kept looking and finally found the perfect thing. It was kinda in the middle of no where but what I always dreamed of was a little white chappel with wooden pews etc that whole movie shabang
it was 1/2 the price of everything else I’d seen- still a little more then I wanted to pay though so I had to give up the videographer I had planned and as of right now that leaves me with no videographer at all cause the one we had was already pretty cheap
so I say keep looking- especally if you are wanting a barn- you might find something free even!