- 6 years ago
- Wedding: January 2013
SO and I have been together for about 2 years and were friends for a year prior to that. I’m in my late 20’s and he’s in his mid-30’s. We’ve both been married before and those marriages both ended about 6 months before we met. He’s always been the more open of us to the idea of getting married again. The idea still scares me a little. But once I warmed up to the idea I thought how great it would be to have a small wedding/elope. I even picked up a great dress for cheap on Ebay. Plus, we both have baby fever and he is adament about getting married before having a baby.
That brings us to last night. My best friend and goddaughter’s mother found out she was pregnant yesterday. Yeah, you think that disturbing mixture of happiness and jealousy is bad when you find out your BFF is engaged. Take that feeling and double it. I managed to put on a happy face for her, but it was hard.
SO and I were talking about it and he says that we can always just go to the courthouse. Now I’m stuck deciding between whether I want to just get married and move on to the next adventure or if I want an actual wedding. All of this without being officially engaged. I have no doubt that if he could afford a ring I would have one already. I’m not entirely sure he’s not making payments on one right now. But we can’t feasibly afford a kid until maybe this time next year. So either way I feel stuck in a waiting hell…