Post # 1
I hate asking people to spend money. I know it’s the norm for the bridal party to be expected to shell out money for attire. But I just feel rotten about it. I’ve asked my BMs to wear a black cocktail dress, around knee length, non-strapless. If they already own it, great. If they find one on sale somewhere, wonderful. If they want to spend $400 on a new dress, that’s on them. I figure this way their dresses will actually be rewearable, and the money will be well spent.
For the GMs… I’d really like to have FH buy a new, very nice black suit (he needs a new one anyway, and will get use out of it). What do I do for the GMs? I could have them rent suits, I suppose, so at least they all match. But that again entails asking them to spend money on something they’ll only get one use out of, which I feel bad about. I’m considering having them all wear their own black suit (and if they don’t own one, they can either buy one or rent one — their choice). Then I’d have them with matching ties or something.
Will it look stupid to have the GMs all in different black suits, even if their ties and boutonnieres match? Anybody have any pictures of this?
Post # 3
I think it should be fine. I’m actually planning on doing the same thing. My BMs are wearing blue so what we did was buy matching blue ties for the guys.
From what i’ve seen, guys wear the jacket only during the ceremony and usually take it off anyway
Post # 4
I’m all for it. I’d say as long as they all have the same lapel (which is more than likely true, since really only the one kind is very popular right now), I think they’ll all look the same. coffeencupcakes is right about the jackets coming off at the reception, so it’s really just the reception and photos it concerns. However, if the difference between 2 and 3 buttons is going to bother you everytime you see those photos, reconsider!
Post # 5
We’re doing this, and I’m not putting any sort of restrictions on what kind of suit it is. Like coffeencupcakes, we bought matching ties for them.
The girls are wearing different styles of dresses (though same color) so I think it would be fine if the boys all wear suits that are different styles but the same color (black). I kind of feel that the differences between them will add visual interest to photos, but that the color same-ness and matching ties will bring it all together.
Post # 6
Nope not stupid! We are doing this as well. I was anti-tuxedo and definitely wanted the men in black suits that they could wear again. Some are in pinstripes, some in textured suits. We’ll tie it all together with matching or coordinating ties, while the groom will match what I’m wearing.
Post # 7
If you trust your BMs to pick a black dress on their own, I’m sure you can trust the GMs to pick a nice black suit on their own, too. The coordinating flowers an ties will definitely bring it all together.
I am not a fan of making everyone in the bridal look exactly dentical. I picked 3 shades of pink from a BM designer line and let each person pick their style of dress and color. For the guys, they were all asked to wear a black suit, and we gave them 2 tie options to choose from. It looked great!
Post # 8
We are actually doing similar to this but with tuxes–my fiance and dad insisted on tuxes over suits, but they each get to pick their own. FI will probably buy a tailored tux, one of his groomsmen already owns a nice one, and everyone else will rent or buy as they choose, only conditions being black, no tails, and no funny collars (ie mandarin/stand up). We are going to set up a rental account with one of the major national chains though for their convenience, if they don’t know where else to go, and give them a couple of options. I’d highly recommend this (even for suits) if some of your groomsmen are fashion-clueless–some guys may prefer not having to think about it.
Post # 9
It is also possible to rent suits from most formalwear places. If you are sure that all the GMs already have black suits, then you don’t have an issue, but if they don’t you might look at rental. The fact is that a nice mens’ suit is a lot more expensive than a nice women’s dress. And a lot of guys where I live (west coast) don’t actually have black suits – although they mostly have dark grey. If you have doubts, you could have them all dress up in their suits and see what it looks like. If it doesn’t please you, then rental is always an option!
Post # 10
I think the maid of honor girls is a great idea I know someone that did that. You sound just like me & as far as the guys go have them rent suits. I feel bad all the time but they all should know how much goes into being a part of a wedding so they expect to spend $$. Get them a good gift you feel really bad.
Post # 11
i’m doing this too! i just think suits are a little more sophisticated (as strange as that sounds) than renting a tux. renting a tux just feels very prom to me, and a beautiful suit is timeless.
so no, i don’t think it would look weird to have gm in mismatched suits, just as i don’t think it’ll look weird to have bms in mismatched dresses. as long as there’s a cohesive element (just like you were talking about with the bouts and ties), i think it’ll be great! but it’s all personal preference — some prefer the matchy-matchy look.
Post # 12
Okay, I come at this from a different take. My groom wants to wear a suit, and emailed his groomsmen to see who has a black suit, etc. All wrote back and said they have a black 3 button suit. However, my FH tried on a 3 button and hated it! We found a perfectly tailored, modern 2 button, and the shop agreed to cut us a deal for 155 for any other suits purchased since he bought his custom suit from the shop as well. 155 dollars! For a suit!!!!
So – now my FH is worried that this is too much to ask of his men. I think that they were going to shell out the money to rent a tux – this is no different. Am I off in this assumption? I would say just go ahead and wear their own black suits, but none of the groomsmen are in town, 1 or 2 have odd taste, and I just am a little worried as to what the larger picture will look like if this happens……..
What to do? Let the guys wear their 3 buttons and my FH is the only 2 button guy? Or have them all buy new suits at the pricepoint we found….
Post # 13
i love this idea! Who ever came up with the wedding party clone syndrome anyway? I say, tell them to wear their own black suits and if they don’t have one, they probably will need one someday anyway!
Post # 14
I say that sounds good to have your FI in a different style than the other guys. My FI is renting the tux and GM’s are wearing black suits in whatever style they have/want to buy.
I think it also serves another purpose…Ever looked at a photo of the wedding party all lined up and at first glance been like, "Why are there 5 guys and only 4 girls?" Then you realize that there are only 4 GM’s and you mistook the groom for the 5th. Just like the bride stands out from the wedding party, I think the groom should, too.
Post # 15
- Wedding: May 2018 - Hotel Vitale
I think we are going to have the two groomsmen wear khaki suits while Mr. PT is wearing a brown suit. So I say go for it!!
Post # 16
I’m in a similar position.. my FI will wear his Air Force Mess Dress (a fancy tux), but then we had the problem of dressing the groomsmen: two are in the Air Forcce and one is not. I think we’re going to have the two in the AF wear their uniforms (navy color) and the other guy just wear a suite. Ugh. It’s still up in the air though since my colors (I think) are pink and black, but three out of the four boys will be wearing navy. So many decisions to make!