Post # 1
So, my fiance just found out his friend (and groomswoman) is 14 weeks pregnant. Our wedding isn’t until October, so she’ll have a tiny baby by the time we get married.
I’m concerned that she’ll be too overwhelmed to be involved in the wedding (fully understandable!) so I figured someone should check in with her. Since she’s a grooms person versus a bridesmaid, she doesn’t have to do too much (I’m not asking her to get involved with BM duties, and it seems like grooms people don’t do as much)…but I don’t want her to feel overwhelmed. And I also want to make sure she can come, because she is one of my fiance’s really good friends and I think he would be sad if she doesn’t.
So…my question is I guess…who should be checking in with her? He’s definitely her friend…I like her and she’s nice, but we’re not friends, mostly becaus I don’t see her enough. Then again, since he’s a boy, my finace doesn’t do well with checking in with friends. I’m shy though and I’d much prefer he talk to her…
Should I just let it be his responsibility since she’s his friend? Or should I be the girl and take over the checking in role?
Post # 3
I’m sorry if this is a dumb question, but what do you mean by “checking in”?
Post # 4
I’d let him deal with it 🙂 Just let her know her only “duty” would be to show up on the wedding day, and be prepared to make arrangements so she can nurse if she chooses to do so 🙂
Post # 5
Oh! Not a dumb question–i guess I mostly mean talking to her and making sure she feels comfortable/up to being involved with the wedding, and even more importantely, that she feels like she’ll be able to come. 🙂
Post # 6
Oh ok hehe. I would say since he is better friends with her, that he should be the one. But, if he feels that he can’t do it because she is going through a ‘woman’ thing, then maybe you can just give her a call and let her know?
Post # 7
why don’t you do it? I mean it’s one of his friends sure but it’s a few minute conversation … it’s not that big of a deal.
Post # 8
Maybe you can both call her. He can start out the convo and say that you wanted to make sure she is 100% stress-free regarding your wedding and hand the phone over to you. I would want to make sure he said the right thing/relayed the right information… but that’s just me!
Post # 9
I would say let him do it, with the acknowledgement you’re both rooting for her! I just think that it’d be easier if he did it, because she might feel like she’s getting pressured from “the bride,” you know? I think it would be easier to tell a groom that you want to back out than a bride. Granted, when one of our groomsmen backed out he told me first, so its probably not a huge deal either way.
But if you want to get closer to her, it’s a good way to start!