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We aren't putting it on the invites, but we've told people who've asked that it's semi-formal to casual.
I wanted to put "cocktail attire" down just to indicate that it was a semi formal affair (seroiusly i don't think everyone has enough common sense to dress nicely) but the fiance said that it sounded too bridezilla and that i would be telling the women they HAVE to wear dresses. Anyways, instead I've been spreading the news, saying it is a semi formal wedding, and indicating so on our website. People think since it's an outdoor summer wedding with knee-length BM dresses ours is casual, so sometimes people just do'nt know. I don't see the hurt in doing it tactfully =]
Hahaha, yes. This is a good question. I am writing a post on silly attire requirements (and ours is silly): garden luxe (I mean, what do you wear to a late afternoon wedding with a formal dinner afterwards)! So silly!
On my wedding website I included a section about what to wear- I wanted to make sure no one showed up in jean or too informal since it is a beach wedding. I suggested they look to Tommy bahama, Ann Taylor, and JCrew for inspiration
I want to put cocktail attire on our invitations, but FI says NO WAY. I don't understand why people wouldn't dress up for a wedding, but I know that some of our guests won't. I guess it's one of those things we have to live with.
We didn't specify what type of attire the guests should wear but in our social circle, 90% of our friends assume that wedding means that the guy should wear a suit and the girl should wear a nice dress and that was fine with us. I don't think they would have dressed any differently unless we specified "casual attire", which we definitely didn't want.
We'll do Black Tie Optional.
Check out Peng's post on this. Very helpful.
I'm definitely stating "casual attire encouraged" for our backyard barbecue wedding.
We're Black Tie and unlike El Capataz we aren't nice enough to make it optional ;)
I'm sure it will annoy some guests but we're totally OK with that. It's a formal evening and we'd like our guests to dress appropriately. My sister did the same and she didn't have to much trouble with it. All the men were actually quite impressed with how dapper they looked!
I put cocktail attire on our invites. I hope it didn't sound bridezilla, I didn't even think about it! Since our wedding is in the evening I actually put that to kind of take off the pressure to be too formal. I personally always stress out a lot when I don't have any attire guidelines for events. I live in fear of being the most or least dressed up.
I'm hoping and praying that my guests know how to dress. But in the end, will I really care if someone shows up in something a little more casual? I doubt it. I'm just happy to share the day with everyone!
We put Black Tie Optional. I would have loved to just say Black Tie, but I figured no matter what I put, not everyone would do it, so if I put optional then I won't be disappointed :) I think at least it alerts people that you are having a formal wedding. I assume people appreciate knowing what will be appropriate to wear. Nothing worse IMO than showing up somewhere way too casual or too dressy!
This is a good question, we're lost too!
We're having an outdoor ceremony, cocktail hour and rececetion. I want our guests to be comfortable, in case it is too hot, but I don't want them not to dress up or, GOD FORBID, wear jeans. The jeans things is my worst nightmare, I've been to too many weddings where this has happened.
Our wedding is in August, but I've suggested people dress like they would for Easter :-/ Is that weird?
Sometimes I'm just floored -- who would ever wear jeans to a wedding? (That wasn't a barbeque or something like that?) But... I'm also shocked when women wear white to weddings. I guess I'm too shockable. ;-)
I didn't think it was possible either, chicagowife, til I went to a wedding wear one guest wore a blue sequined cocktail dress to the afternoon Catholic mass then changed for the reception into khaki cut-off shorts.
chicagowife - I am also shocked!
amysue - that is a great description :)
We didn't, since our wedding was pretty typical. But I always appreciate it if the wedding is anything other than the standard "church/wedding clothes." I'm more than happy to dress however the bride and groom want, so I like the heads-up.
I'm early in the planning process, but I would probably want somewhere between dressy casual and cocktail attire because it will be a evening tent reception. I don't know that I will necessarily put it on the invites, but I will probably include it on the wedding website and would let anyone know that would ask.
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Follow up to this post:
Are you going to put the Guest Attire request on your wedding website?
Nope! but then again we aren't really directing anyone to it on our printed materials so I don't think it would have an impact.
If you're concerned that people need time to plan (like I said my sister's was BT and my guests will expect mine to be as well) I don't see anything wrong with putting it on there.
I originally wasn't going to direct people how to dress, since I thought they could figure it out on their own. (Outdoor afternoon August wedding at family members property) After many people asked me specifically what they should wear I came up with the term "casual chic". I also said look to JCrew for inspiration! Summer dresses for the ladies and "sunday shorts" (essentially dress shorts) and dress shirts for the guys are perfectly fine with me... I'm afraid of the denim making an appearance too, no jeans please!!
and yes, I will be putting a little insert on our website about dress code.
i wasn't planning to specify, as it's a lakeside wedding in august...so i was expecting sundresses and such....at least until my FMIL told me her sister-in-law asked if her girls & husband could wear shorts. UMMMM NO! seriously. do grown men really wear shorts to weddings these days and think it's ok? sheesh!! and i don't see these folks wearing jcrew-inspired "resort casual" shorts. i'm terribly afraid of the denim shorts.
I did not put the dress code on the invitation, but I did mention on the website that some activities will be outdoors (I have been to one wedding where I did not know that -- not the bride's fault, my date's, but really!). I suggested "dressy casual" to "informal". I know it's a whole nother thing to figure out what that means, but casual dresses/ nice pants, nothing fancy, no jeans or sneakers.
so here is the thing...i live in maine and have been to many weddings in maine and many many people show up to weddings in jeans!! i just don't get it...i am originally from new york city and really, if i had very showed up to a wedding in jeans, i would be laughed out on my behind...i put on our invitations in total bridezilla fashion..."our wedding is a formal affair, please dress accordingly..." my FH thinks it is totally rude....and maybe it is, but i really hate it when people wear jeans to a wedding...we are getting married in a ball room...i won't be kicking anyone out or anything, but i really don't want people to wear jeans!!!
We did not write the dress code on the invitations, but did put it on the website and had lots of word-of-mouth. "Dressy Casual" was what we were looking for, but still had about 10 people wear jeans. One guy's wife even wore a full denim outfit!! I didn't really care the day of, but now looking back at pictures, it seems my photographer got a picture of every one of them in somehow. Horrible!
I also can't understand how people think it's ok to wear jeans to a wedding...but let me tell ya, they'll do it!
I am thinking of having something like "Garden Chic" or something like that. I want them to know that we will be outside on the grass, but I want them to "dress up" a little.
we are thinking of putting 'semi-formal attire' on the bottoms of our invites. but since our location is beachside, casual is good too.
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Are you suggesting or requesting specific attire for your guests? (For example, semiformal, black tie preferred, black tie.)