Guest list/ invite Questions...Help!!

Add New »

Place card table centerpiece inspirational photo!

more by Juliemd414

Guest list/ invite Questions...Help!!

posted 3 years ago in Etiquette

Member

423 posts

Helper bee

Juliemd414 7/25/09 STL

Help!!

My Fi and I are trying to have a small wedding. We have had a lot of stress over the guest list already...

I have already sent out most of my invites and I am now second guessing myself when it comes to inviting "work related people".

I just sent out invites last week, so I do still have time to send out more if needed, but....

I didn't invite any "work people"... I don't work in an office or go to the same place day to day nor do I work with the same people on a regular basis... I do have an agent who books me jobs that I deal with through emails and over the phone... (I don't really know her as a friend just a work relationship)

Should I invite my agent? If I do invite my agent I may need to invite her assistant whom I also deal with occasionally....

If I don't invite my agent (she knows I am getting married and when since she asked me about it) how do I let her know in a nice way that she isn't invited.... I don't wan to hurt anyone's feelings.

Also, My photographer is a "sort of" friend - well we don't hang out or anything, but I know him pretty well. He is shooting pics before the ceremony and during but not shooting the reception. Do I need to invite him to the reception? If so, do I need to invite his assistant and let him bring his wife???

Any suggestions would be appreciated :)

3 years ago

Member

69 posts

Worker bee

nc80120 8/8/9 Denver

As for your agent.. just let her know "we are having a family only or very small wedding". We have used that line and it works great. Everyone understands. If you dont see them and have a relationship outside of work, i dont think you need to worry about inviting them. Even more so, since you do not work in the same office.

As far as the photographer, I have no idea. I would base it on your relationship with him. Sorry, not much help there.

3 years ago

Member

129 posts

Blushing bee

msprettyinpink September 6, 2009 San Diego

I don't think, besides distant family members, there is anyone that you have an 'obligation' to invite. You should invite those that you feel comfortable with and want at your wedding.

As for your agent and photographer, it's really your call. Depending on your venue, you might have to provide meals for your vendors anyways, if so, then it wouldn't be a big deal for your to just extend a formal invitation as opposed to giving him the same meal as a 'vendor.' I think the question to ask here is - Is he coming as my friend or as my vendor? That should hopefully help you to decide whether or not to invite his wife. Unless the assistant is a friend, my comments for vendors above probably apply.

Another way to cut down on a guest list is of course to discourage those who aren't in a serious relationship to not bring random dates. Some may disagree with me, but it's them you want at the wedding, not the random date.

My last comment - maybe wait a little bit to see how many RSVPs you get for the wedding. If enough people end up saying no, then you can invite the photographer or agent guilt-free because you'll have space for them. We have an A list and a B list for that purpose and are sending our invites out 3 months in advance.

I hope that was helpful.

3 years ago

Member

87 posts

Worker bee

galandrien Dec 14 2009 DC

I think inviting the photographer if at all possible is a nice touch, even though you are probably paying him it is a nice way to thank him for taking care to photograph your ceremony. And well if you invite him then his wife I think is a must. I don't think I know of a situation where someone can be denied an option to bring their spouse without it being considered rude. It kinda sucks cause it makes a guest list get big real quick.