(Closed) Guest list is growing AFTER invites were sent

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
3576 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Wait, I’m confused.  Soooo, you sent out invites 3 weeks ago.  FH’s EXTENDED family is getting upset because they were not sent invites?  And they are still planning to come as guests?  Is this correct? 

Post # 4
1775 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

I’m confused.  Is it that lots of people are responding that they are coming when they didn’t receive an invitation?

Post # 5
3564 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I am having the SAME issue, except it’s my parents. My mom gave me a list of people, but said “Oh don’t send so and so save the dates, I’m not sure if I want to invite them.” And now of course, she wants me to send them invitations. It’s just so frustrating because I had my mind set on our original guest list and count, and now I have to add to it! I’m thinking about lying and just saying we don’t have any more invitations to send out…

Post # 6
3219 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

Honestly I would tell them, Im sorry there is limited space and we didnt get your address in time.

Post # 7
3176 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

That sucks, but you shouldn’t have to do anything. Have FH explain to his mom and dad that the venue simply cannot accomodate everyone and that they FMIL/FFIL need to understand that and they need to spread the word to the family that didn’t get invites, if you didn’t get an invitation you are not invited!

Post # 9
1260 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Sorry, just so I am clear, your brother asked extended family for addresses, they never responded, so you made a guest list based on addresses you did have, sent them out, and now others are responding with their addresses. I think it is unfair of them to put you in that position. If your venue can’t accomodate more people, then stick with your original invites and have your Fiance (or his brother) explain to other family members they waited too long, and the venue is full. If they wanted to come badly enough, they should have been on top of it.  The only other option would be to wait and see who RSVPs, and then fill up the venue with the extra family members if others who were invited first say no. It’s likely too late to changes venues to accomodate more people. Many people will likely disagree with my sentiments, but it is how I feel. Good luck with whatever you decide to do!



Post # 11
3620 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I ran into a similar issue – sent invitations,and then Future Mother-In-Law said ‘oh, I MEANT to invite so-and-so… they HAVE to be invited…” Ugh…

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