Guest list is killing me!

posted 3 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
1625 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

@lampshade:  You sound like me! But my case is even more extreme.. Including my aunts, uncles, and cousins, my family comes to less than SOs IMMEDIATE family, ie brothers/sisters/parents/stepparents and their kids. If we let his extended family ie aunts and cousins but NOT their kids come, it will add an extra 30-50 people to our list. 

I don’t think it’s fair that you might have to cut some of your family members to make room for his. Maybe you can come up with a number and cut the number of invited guests on each side evenly in half?

Also, if you’re doing a backyard party, you don’t really need to have a SEAT for every body attending! If it’s casual, have a few tables to stand at, maybe a couple of benches? If it’s super casual and the yard is big, lay blankets out picnic style!

Post # 4
Member
24 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I feel for you. Food and drinks is the main expense for me, too.  It feels like a vicious circle. I am still hemming and hawwing because we haven’t sent out our invitations yet. We have 120 guests but ideally I want 80 to show up! (20 of those are church friends of my FMIL who neither of us know) 

What helped me with the anxiety was having a definite budget total, and an ideal number of guests. Divide what you can afford on food from your total by guest count and research what options you have. If you are not using a professional caterer, everyone loves burgers and hot dogs. (Or veggie ones.) In bulk, that may be affordable.

We went with a reception venue because my FI didn’t want an outdoor reception. I would have totally done a BBQ otherwise. 

 

Post # 6
Member
24 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Another suggestion is if you have any family members who enjoy cooking, divvy it up. My mother can’t afford to technically give us a large chunk of money for the wedding, but she took over making the favors. Maybe someone will take over the fruit, another the pizza, etc. ?

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