Post # 1
Ladies, as the MOB, I am at my wit’s end! We have always had a great relationship with the grooms parents but they are extreme procrastinators and who do things on their own time never realizing how inconsiderate they are really being to others.
The problem? We need to send our STD’s next weekend and I don’t even have their guest list! Seriously! I mentioned it in July and in August sent an email requesting to have it by Oct 1 so that we would have ample time. I send reminder messages daily and always get “oh I’m almost done”, “I’ll bring them over later”. The MOH is waiting on this list for the shower invites as well. There are multiple reasons as you know I need this list. The groom is upset, he’s asked as well. I’m not angry, I’m just really put out that someone can be so rude and so inconsiderate as to not think this is important.
Uggghhh…sorry, I just had to get that out there! Thank you ladies for listening to me rant.
Post # 3
That IS inconsiderate.
Are you having a destination wedding? The good news is that if you’re not, STDs are not necessary. Two months is plenty of time for people to make non-international travel plans.
Maybe suggest to the groom that he go over to his parents house and literally sit down with them and force the list out of them?
Post # 4
It’s not destination but we have a very large number of out of town guests. Some who travel for work who need to put it in their schedule.
I know 10 years ago STD’s didn’t exist but it’s just inconsiderate. The bride & groom DID sit with them to do the guest list but now it’s getting the actual addresses. How difficult can that be when it’s your family?
We also need it because the big shower is in December since the bride will be home for holiday so it’s needed for many reasons.
I know it seems petty, but I can’t imagine ever doing this to anyone else. I’m a believer that you should respect others time and they just don’t get it.
Post # 5
Assuming you’re not going planning to go over their guest list to have a “whittling it down” discussion, I would just tell them to send it as it is THIS MINUTE and go from there.
It’s not the end of the world if some people don’t get a save the date. I didn’t send one to everybody I eventually ended up inviting to our wedding. Just to the people I KNEW we’d be inviting, to allow myself some flexibility in figuring out the rest later on.
If they can’t think of the people right now, they’re likely on the fence about them. Save yourself the trouble of having to invite somebody that isnt’ really wanted 4 months from now, and just skip the save the date.
Post # 6
I would honestly tell them that if they did not send the list to you right now (or by some date) that their list would not be included. plain and simple.
That is just so rude! I feel like if they cared about certain people being invited, they should have sent you the list already.
Did the groom already give you a list from him and these are just his parent’s friends?