- 3 years ago
- Wedding: September 2014
I just need to vent to someone. Yesterday I received a text message from one of my college roommates. She asked, “I know your wedding is a long way away, but I wanted to make sure that I can bring a date to it.” Okay, fine. She doesn’t have a boyfriend or even a prospective one but I said sure because I want her to come. Then, she texts me about 2 hours later and says, “I’m not sure if you have thought about it, but I think you should invite my sister and her husband, too. They would really love to come. I told them all about it during dinner.” This time, I said, “You know, we haven’t finalized the guest list and won’t know about numbers until at least next summer.”
That whole exchange was annoying enough because, although I was close to the roommate in college, it has been 4 years and we are not nearly as close as we used to be. I have met her sister a handful of times and do not think I’ve ever said a word to her sister’s husband. I was not invited to her sister’s wedding but still sent a gift. I never received a thank you card for that gift and still get irked by it.
So tonight, my FI gets a text from a groomsman. He asks, “Hey, can I bring my cousin up with me for the wedding?” My FI has never met this cousin but says, sure, that’s fine. Afterall, he is a groomsman and isn’t planning to bring a date. Then the groomsman asks if he and the cousin can stay with us so they don’t have to get a hotel room. Then informs my FI that the cousin doesn’t want to leave his wife at home, so she would come, too. WTF.
First of all, when did it become okay for guests to text and ask about inviting others? Isn’t this one of the conversations that are better had on the phone or in person? Secondly, we have 10 months until the wedding, why did I have 2 guests in 2 days ask about bringing people? Is it only going to get worse? Finally, these are people who should know etiquette and they don’t. How were they raised that this is okay? I had FI tell the best man the same spiel, “We are still finalizing the guest list and will not be able to accomodate all of those we wish we could.”