Post # 1
7 People RSVPed yes and and are now pulling out two weeks before – I am so frustrated.
We are having a small wedding so really cut our guestlist down to 70 and now we have people pulling out and its too late to invite any others who we would love to be there.
7 people cancel 2 weeks before the wedding out of a total confirmed guestlist 0f 70. 10% in a week – are you kidding me!?
Anyone else going through the same thing?
Post # 3
That’s pretty crazy… I think it’s pretty rude after they rsvp to then decline. I mean, you have already made arrangements for those extra 7 people. That could be a whole table. Did they give an excuse as to why?
Post # 4
A couple had legit reason – but others pretty sketchy – a charity event they knew was on the same day but as the date got closer decided they couldnt miss. That was the one that made me the most mad – he know about this months ago.
I guess im most annoyed there are people that we could have invited and would love to be there but wont be able to make it as its a semi destination wedding – at least 4 hours travel for most of my friends, and more for my fiances friends as we live in a different country to where we are gettting married.
Post # 5
Ugh we had a few people pull out last minute and it sucked. I was additionally frustrated by the fact that they didn’t even tell me, but just my MIL.
DH’s cousin requested the wrong day off (WTF?) so he and his girlfriend couldn’t come as of a few days before, and then the day before, DH’s uncle and aunt (parents of said cousin) decided they weren’t up to making the drive to the wedding. Sigh. The cousin was far enough in advance to change the seating chart around, but the second couple totally screwed up my seating chart so one table had four people while the rest had six or seven. Not a huge deal, I guess, but certainly stressful and frustrating right before the wedding!
At least they had excuses that, while flimsy, did make sense. I’d be hella pissed if people just didn’t show up or backed out last minute for no reason at all.
Post # 6
@Mrs-Sept-2013: I had about 15 pull out the week of with a bunch of BS excuses. All I can say is try not to worry about them. My
guest list was about 150 so 15 was about 10%. I honestly didnt miss any of them!!! I will be honest though….I dont have much to say to them now that they did that bc it was over $200 a person so some that pulled out if they were coming with a guest that was over $400 lost.
Post # 7
Wow – I guess at least they did it before my catering deadline. Having to fork out for them would be even more annoying.
@gelaine22 Sorry that sucks – thank you for helping me find a silver lining though! Hope you had an amazing day!
Post # 8
@Mrs-Sept-2013: The same thing just happened to us!! It was 3 people though and two had the same excuse you describe: charity event double booking. As simiar to you, invites went out months ago so this late in the game to decline is just rude.
Is it possible to recoup those costs (i.e. catering or favors or etc?)?
Post # 9
Well, that just sucks.
Nobody pulled out last minute for my wedding that I can think of, but 10 people out of my 96 person wedding RSVPed yes & then just didn’t show up & many are now overtly ignoring me.
It’s incredibly rude. I hope your guests give you a good excuse, & if they don’t, then maybe an evaluation of whether the relationship with said people is worth continuing. That might seem harsh, but pulling out of attending a wedding with just 2 weeks to go is pretty rude & inconsiderate if it isn’t accompanied by a darn good reason.
Post # 10
@yellowballoon: Sorry it’s happening to you too! Can’t believe they had the same excuses! I’m not too worried about the costs, more sad that there are people that could have come and we would have loved to have had there but can’t.
Heyhoo. Worrying about last minute pull outs?
Post # 11
Yeah totally understand. One of my DH’s cousin and her fiance broke up about 3 weeks before the wedding, but didn’t tell us her FI would not be attending until the day before. I found that completely rude as we’d paid for his place and dinner and could have maybe invited another friend instead. Totally selfish to accept and then not tell people you aren’t coming. GRRRRR!!!
Post # 12
We’ve had a few of those. As well as people who never RSVPd, won’t respond to my attempts to contact them. Interestingly, those people are avoiding me like the plague at present. I think they’re ashamed of how they behaved and don’t currently know what to say to me. 2 of them I actually reached out to and they were both so relieved that I didn’t hate them. I didn’t respect that though, I thought “so, instead of manning up and apologizing for not keeping your word, you were just going to avoid me for the rest of your life? ok.” I have one who dropped out via email and asked me to call HER so we can talk about it. Ummm, NOT gonna happen. I’m a little busy planning a freaking wedding, not about to chase you around to hear the excuse you’ve been cooking up for at least 2 weeks now.
Post # 13
@Overjoyed: Same thing – by email! FI had some good school friends who never replied at all either. I suppose it shows you who your real friends are.
We know it was a big ask for alot of people as many were having to travel internationally, throughout we said we were totally understanding if it was too much, but to not even reply? To me, it says you’re not a friend who values the relationship at all. Real friends can talk about anything and don’t hide behind crappy, last minute excuses via email, or by avoiding the situation all together.
I suppose the best thing is just to let it all roll off and just make sure you really value and enjoy the friends who go above and beyond to make it to your day.
But it’s so nice to know it’s not just us! Hope you girls feel the same!