Post # 1
long story but 2 of our guests are now not eating with everyone else at the venue buy going to the pub down the road instead. i now have to re think my table plan (which was finished) but what i want to do my fiance thinks i shouldnt.
If i dont mix the tables round a bit one would have 9 people and the other only 5 which to me would be stupid so i thought about splitting these two tables and having all the adults on one and the children (who are all over 13) on the other.
This would mean some people from both sides of the family on each table.
I sat like this at a wedding i went to and it was fine, everyone spoke to each other and it wasnt an issue.
My fiance thinks people will want to sit with their family. This would mean my 13 year old cousin sat on a table full of adults all having adult conversation, and on the other table two 21 year olds sat with their parents and grandparents.
What should i do!
(wasnt sure where to post this so please move if in the wrong place!)
Post # 3
@ChocolateLime: My teenage kids would much rather sit with family, way preferable to sitting with teenagers they don’t know. Especially since 13 and 21 year olds don’t have a lot in common.
Are these the only two tables, or do you have others? If you have others you could move one couple (say an aunt+uncle or a very close friend of the family) to the table of 5.
Post # 4
all of the other tables have 8 people on and works out really well so its just these two tables. Its tricky as there are two adults on one table that are part of my mums family but really do not get on with my mums sisters so i have had to put them with my dads brother and wife instead.
I could leave the 13 year old with her mum and have another table of 8 and just leave 6 on the other one which would be all 21 year olds.
Post # 5
@ChocolateLime: A table of 21 year olds doesn’t sound too bad so long as everyone knows someone. Why don’t you phone/text/facebook your 13 y.o. cousin (or her parents) and ask which table she’d prefer? But when I was that age, I’d prefer to sit with my parents; and my kids are/were the same.
Post # 6
@ChocolateLime: I would do this second option, leave the 13yo w/ parents and put the 21yos together. I don’t think a table of 8 and a table of 6 is bad. I think that’s by far the best compromise. I wouldn’t put the 13yo with the 21yos; that’s a huuuge age/maturity distance (not to mention everyone else can drink alcohol…) Then you have all tables of 8 and one of 6, that sounds perfect. There’s seriously no need to have mostly 8 and then two 7s. Trust me, I understand the frustrations of seating charts… trying to work on mine now….
Post # 7
@ChocolateLime: As a teenage wedding guest I would have rather not sat with the adults. I have been to a few weddings where I sat with relatives from the other side and I thought it was awesome getting to know them! If FI really won’t budge on this can you get a smaller table for the 5? My venue has all different size tables so it wouldn’t look weird, not sure how yours is.
Post # 8
I have gone through weddings of my own and 3 of my daughters. I wholeheartedly agree that people DO want to sit, socialize, and visit with family! At last DD’s wedding we had a table of 6 on our side and a table of 5 on his side. It looked fine. People do NOT notice stuff like that! I would have never mixed the tables so they looked pretty at the expense of not sitting people with others they know and enjoy. You are over-thinking this one big time. Just leave it as is!
Post # 9
@ChocolateLime: If I was 21, I’d hate sitting with 13 year olds. A 21 year old is not a child and should be seated with the adults. I’d keep the tables as is and people will appreciate the extra elbow room at the less crowded table.
Post # 10
by children i mean children of the adults not as in definition by age.
Everybody would know somebody no matter how i arranged it, so im not really worried about that, its whether i should move the 13yr old away fromh er parents.
I have however decided to leave her be, but move the adults from one table onto the other so all the 21yr olds can all sit together and have a bit of fun away from the parents.
I am happy that this was the right desicion to make and appreciate everyones input,