(Closed) Guilt over no strip club from best man

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
2786 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

While I don’t totally agree with your viewpoint on the stripper thing, I kind of understand.

What I don’t understand is why you intervened and told his friends no strippers-couldn’t your FI have told them he didn’t want to go?

I don’t think the BM is right to be sh$t talking you like he is-but if you told them not to go….that is the reason why they didn’t go, so technically he isn’t wrong….I don’t think you are the bad guy-if you feel uncomfortable, you feel uncomfortable, and you have every right to feel that way. I just think that your FI should have just told everyone it was him that didn’t want to go, so you weren’t painted like the bad guy.

The guy sounds like a jerk….honestly, I’m sorry but I don’t think you can do anything but let it go at this point.

Post # 4
Member
804 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

This guy is a jerk.  It’s not JUST that you didn’t want strippers for your FI’s bachelor party, but he wasn’t comfortable with it either…if he intervened at his best man’s party, then he clearly has a problem with it, and that should be respected.  His best man making it all about you not only was a slight against you, but it was a slight against your FI as if you’re not a real man unless you want strippers at your bachelor party.

If your FI doesn’t think you’re the bad guy, please let your mind be at ease.  This guy only made himself look bad.  It sounds like the fight wasn’t just over the strippers, but also about best man refusing to do any work for the bachelor party and your fiance resenting it when he then voiced a complaint about how it turned out.  Can you imagine that?  It would be like your maid of honor telling people “The shower is going to be on this day!” but then telling you “Well nothing’s planned, I don’t know what to do,” but people are coming so you do the work, and then she complains that there weren’t enough games or the food wasn’t right.  Excuse me, you refused to plan, so don’t complain to me that I had to arrange things for a party in my honor and it wasn’t to your liking.

Sorry to rant a little at the end, but that’s what happened, and it sounds like at least half of the fight was about that more than it was about you not wanting strippers there.  Best man should not have said anything.

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