(Closed) Had a timeline talk…confused!

posted 5 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
1846 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Just a quick question, howsold are you if you don’t mind me asking?.

Post # 4
831 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

I don’t think it’s confusing. He wants to marry you but wants to wait to propose until you’ve been together for a year. Obviously your relationship progressed quickly and it’s going well if you are having this discussion after 7 months. However, he is being prudent and wants to date for a few more months.

5 months will fly by. Unless you are looking for some unique custom ring it doesn’t take all that long to pick out and buy an engagment ring, so I wouldn’t worry abou that yet.

Post # 5
621 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

@mojitolady:  It sounds like he is excited and wanting to marry you. This might be just me, but I think waiting a year might be a good thing. It lets you see each other through true ups and downs and the “so excited you’re bursting at the seams” feeling sort of wears off and you are able to make a logical decision.

 Congratulations, it sounds like an engagement isnt far off!

Post # 6
513 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@mojitolady:  That is so sweet! I especially loved the last part. “To which I said “you should ask when it feels right, like when you’re bursting at the seams and can’t wait another minute to ask me to be your wife”. He laughed and said “but I’m already there”.” πŸ™‚

He probably brought it up to see exactly where you stood and what your true feelings were. Would you want him to completely surprise you with a ring that he picked out, or would you rather help choose it? Maybe toss some subtle hints out there for the style that you like?


Post # 7
2610 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014 - Madison, WI

I feel like maybe he asked to make sure you’re both on the same page, do you also feel 100% sure. It’s also not unusual for couples to wait until the one year mark. Usually by then for most couples that “honeymoon” stage of the relationship has faded and you’ve been through some more trying times together. It just can solidify what you already know. Plus it gives you both time to adapt to the idea of being engaged and being married. I agree that 5 months will go by quickly.


Post # 8
9627 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

@mojitolady:  This is perfect!  He wants to marry you.  Carry on as always and consider if all goes well he’ll be proposing to you shortly after the 1 year mark.  πŸ™‚  Of course, you can always start looking for engagement ring ideas!  Let him know you’re just as excited, in love and into him as he is into you!

This is one of the best waiting stories I’ve ever read on this board.  Yay!

Post # 10
4524 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@mojitolady:  Not odd at all he wants to wait until the one year mark: Boyfriend or Best Friend and I moved across the country like 4 months after we started dating, both firmly convinced by then that we were going to get married…but no ring! We have been together 2 years and supposedly he’s proposing by end of August. I asked him, though, if he had a ring after we moved, would he have proposed? He said No! He told me he wanted to be together at least a year. He’s 40 and quite rationale, and I certainly can appreciate his responsible approach to marriage.

Post # 11
849 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

It does sound like he’s waiting until the one year mark. Try to enjoy your relationship the way it is now and the time will fly by! πŸ™‚

Post # 12
3772 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

maybe he was testing the waters? He may have been afraid to propose before because he thought you may think it was too early? with him bringing it up like that he got to see how you felt πŸ™‚

Post # 13
11752 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Good news! I don’t think you should read into the WHY he brought it up. Maybe he just wanted to let you know how much he loves you and that it’s on his mind. I don’t think he was trying to get you to convince him to do it sooner or later or anything. And technically, he didn’t bring it up – he was just responding to your question!  It seems like he’s open to talking about it though, so if you have any questions just ask him! πŸ™‚

Post # 14
3469 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

The time will go FAST. And like you said 7 months isn’t that long so give it some time. Marriage is a huge commitment more time will make you feel confident that you’re ready. If it makes you feel better my boyfriend and I have been together for over 2 years and have been living together for 6 months (not too long, but its amazing!) and we’re waiting to get engaged until next year so by the time we get engaged we’ll have been together for over 3 years. More time with him just validates how much I love him and that he is the one I want to spend my life with πŸ™‚

Post # 15
1459 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2017 - Bristol zoo

Even in a case as romantic as wanting to propose I think that rationality can win out. I think when we first started dating Boyfriend or Best Friend told me that he’d never ever consider proposing to someone if he’d been with them less than a year, I think this would be true even if he’d found a girl that he *knew* he wanted to marry early on in the relationship. So it’s no bad thing that your Boyfriend or Best Friend is being rational.


I reckon your bloke was testing the waters, and 5 months really won’t end up seeming so long! Best of luck to you x

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