Post # 1
Hi everyone so unfort. FH’s grandfather passed away last night and he is a mess. I too lost my nana not too long ago this past July. I am trying to be strong and supportive for him as much as I can, but when I think about or see him upset it makes me want to cry. I hold it in bc for some reason I think if he doesn’t see me cry he will know I am really here for him and I am being the strong one right now. However I still am healing myself and I told him we will heal together bc I know how he is feeling, the arrangements were made for this Thurs. n Fri. do you think it’s ok if I show my sad feelings (bc it is reminding me of my sadness from a couple months ago) or should I hold back as much as I can?? I’m not sure what to do I think I’m handling it ok bc he said how much he loves me and is happy I am here for him, but I don’t know how to help him the best way, any ideas??
Post # 3
I’m sorry you guys are going through this. Death is not an easy thing to deal with. I know my husband is REALLY not sure how to handle me when I lose it on Holidays, so I can see your dilemma. I think if you are sad, too, it’s okay to cry. After all, you are still grieving! You can’t deny that. And i’m sure you knew his grandpa, too. My grief counselor told me it takes 18 months to fully process. It takes time. If you feel uncomfortable crying with him (like you feel somehow it’s making it worse for him), give him a hug, then go cry a little, then come back when you feel better.
Post # 4
First, I am so terribly sorry for the losses experience by you and your FI. This is a trying time for both of you. I just wanted to let you know that it is absolutely okay for you to be sad and reaveal your feelings to your FI. Some of the most amazing and heartfelt moments in a relationship can be experience when you show yourself at your most vulnerable to your significant other. This can be very difficult to do, believe me I know. Just know that it doesn’t mean you are supporting him any less if you cry yourself. Simply hold his hand or hug him, and cry together. There is no right thing to say or do – just do what feels good for you. HUGS!
Post # 5
thanks ladies your suggestions really helped 🙂