Handling In-Laws/Baby Festivities

posted 2 weeks ago in Pregnancy
Post # 2
Member
72 posts
Worker bee

So it seems like the SIL is the main problem. Why can’t you just not invite her? 

 

Post # 3
Member
140 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

iamdre :  I would think the guest list would pretty much be up to the person hosting, if someone offered to host.

My family lives about 4 hours from DH’s family so we ended up having 2 showers, one for my side and one for his. I’d say that is fairly common, especially if you have family in different areas. 

My best advice would be to go into this with the expectation that there will be some sort of drama but it doesn’t have to ruin your day or your pregnancy. It’s just one day and while it’s lovely to celebrate with family you’ll have many other celebrations over the years and what is most important is you, your husband and your little bean. That was if something were to happen you would have been expecting it, and if something doesn’t that’s a bonus. 

Post # 4
Member
140 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

iamdre :  I just wanted to add that I was super hands off with my showers and I found that the easiest to keep stress down. You have waayyyyyy more important things to be dealing with then worrying about potential drama at a potential party, take care of yourself and your babe and let whoever is doing the planning for the parties plan. 

Post # 8
Member
140 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

iamdre :  My 2 SIL’s and one of my friends hosted my baby shower for DH’s side/my friends who live in the area. They hosted at my DH’s aunts house. 

An invitation was extended to the grandparents (our parents) to travel to either location to celebrate as well, neither did, which is pretty much what we expected. 

Honestly, if it were me I would still invite MIL and SIL to your DH’s side shower, mainly just to keep the peace (even if ironically it does turn it into a shit show). That way when/if drama occurs you won’t be involved. 

Btw, there was also family drama with my DH’s side around my shower too (not because of, but happening the same time). It didn’t involve me and really didn’t impact me at all, you just need to focus on something else, like a baby!! Way too exciting!

 

ETA: I saw you asked about your side hosting, sorry! I would think it rude to not invite the grandparents to any shower being hosted, but ultimately that would be up to whoever is hosting. 

 

I also wanted to add, kids are a total game changer. I’m not saying your inlaws will change, but they may be different with your children. I’ve always had a rocky relationship with my one SIL, but she is an amazing aunt and loves our LO sooooo much, it’s actually improved our relationship too. 

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