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has anyone done the waiting period waiver?

posted 2 years ago in Boston
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    1.
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    Busy bee
    worcesterbride    August 15, 2009   live in NYC, wedding in Worcester, MA

    Hey Ladies,

    We're marrying in Worcester but live in NYC... FI is not able to get the day off of work to visit MA for our marriage license, which ordinarily must be done by the Tuesday prior to the (Saturday) wedding. We think our best option is to go to the courthouse on Friday for a waiver of the 3-day waiting period, and then take that to the city clerk. Has anyone done this (in Worcester or any other city)? Does anyone have more information? Thanks!

     
    2.
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    Blushing bee
    brideesq    October 12, 2008   Boston

    In my experience, judges do not enjoy granting such waivers for non-emergency circumstances. That does not mean it won't happen but it is definitely a risk and could make for a very stressful Friday. You don't have to apply for a license in the town you are getting married in. Perhaps you could map out the closest town in MA from NYC and you both could take a half day off (drive up/apply/drive home).

     
    3.
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    Sugar bee
    2dBride    October 6, 2009   Washington, DC.

    Wow!  Our rabbi had told us they were pretty much automatic, especially since you have the option to go to a different court if the first one does not agree.  We're in DC, and don't plan on getting to MA until the day before the wedding.  I'm trying to figure out whether the 16-hour round trip to get the license beforehand would be worth it to avoid that anxiety.

     
    4.
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    Blushing bee
    brideesq    October 12, 2008   Boston

    I would call the local clerk and ask just to be sure there won't be any problems. It would be horrible to plan a wedding and then not have a legal ceremony!

     
    5.
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    Bumble bee
    Gilneas    October 10, 2010   NJ

    Also, check into how EARLY you can get it.. like, in NJ, you can apply up to sixty days in advance, and pick it up thirty days in advance... any chance you can get there to apply any day prior to the wedding, and then pick it up on that Friday?

    I concur with other people... definetly call the clerk you intend to go to before you try doing this, as it could make for a very stressful wedding weekend.

     
    6.
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    Busy bee
    loralie    April 25, 2009   Estes Park, CO

    In Tangipahoa parish (parish in Louisiana = county in every other state), the actually have ones that have been signed by a judge granting the waiver - my first husband & I were automatically given one. 

     
    7.
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    Busy bee
    worcesterbride    August 15, 2009   live in NYC, wedding in Worcester, MA

    The person I spoke to at the city clerk's office said that he'd never seen a request denied except in one case where the "bride" was also underage (14), but that maybe we would have to wait for a while. I wish that we could get this done early but unfortunately, even taking a half-day is not an option... FI is taking one day for the wedding and 8 for the honeymoon, and has used his other vacation day (he gets 10) already. Our only alternative would be cancelling and rebooking the honeymoon flights (not good)!

     
    8.
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    Blushing bee
    brideesq    October 12, 2008   Boston

    well definitely don't mess with the honeymoon!!!! :-)

     
    9.
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    Buzzing bee
    JoesWifey    May 24, 2009   NYC/Wedding in Indiana

    Is taking an unpaid sick day an option? Just calling in the day of and saying he's sick?

     
    10.
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    Blushing bee
    boston@heart    8/30/09   los angeles

    I'm in a similar situation.  I was under the impression that it is hard to get waived.  We are coming from CA and I just can't afford to take any more time off. 

    Luckily, my boss agreed to let me work from home for one day while in Boston, so  we will be able to arrive one day earlier than expected (Thursday).  Our wedding is on Sunday and my cousin is our officiant-for-a-day.  So we are going to have her be the officiant for Monday instead of Sunday (Sunday will be too early).  We will still have a 'mock' wedding on Sunday and then just have her sign the license on Monday.  We are not telling anyone that the Sunday wedding is a mock wedding.

     

    Your other option is to get married ahead of time in NY and then just have a mock wedding in MA.  Just don't tell anyone.

     

     
    11.
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    Bumble bee
    Gilneas    October 10, 2010   NJ

    Boston@heart, I wouldn't call the actual ceremony, with everyone there, the "mock wedding" - a lot of times, when people do it, it's more like the real ceremony, or the ceremony of the heart, and the one with the legal stuff is just that - signing the paperwork, or the legal ceremony.

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    12.
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    Blushing bee
    boston@heart    8/30/09   los angeles

    Gilneas - I know what you mean.  I never would've called it that on my own.  When I called city hall, that's what they called it.  I latched onto it because it was just easier to say without needing any further explanation.  I like 'ceremony of the heart', that's cute.

     
    13.
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    Busy bee
    worcesterbride    August 15, 2009   live in NYC, wedding in Worcester, MA

    Just to update this in case someone finds it in a search - WorcesterGroom and I weren't able to find a way to apply in the required time period in MA, so he got into town on Thursday and we applied that day for a waiver to the 3-day waiting period.

    The process was time-consuming but smooth, and we got our waiver. We waited in line at the courthouse, where paid the fee and filled out a form, and then we were told we would be in the 2 o'clock court session, about 45 minutes later. We waited our turn in the courtroom (there were some custody cases and someone who wanted control of her mother's finances b/c the mom had alzheimer's. It was sad.) When we were called up, the judge asked how long we had known each other and why we wanted the waiver - we said that we were having a church ceremony on Saturday and would like to be able to make it legal that day. He guessed that we had been surprised by the waiting period, and we explained that we knew about it, but WG hadn't been able to get the extra day off of work. Then he asked some kind of conversational questions about where we met, where we lived, etc. (maybe to make sure we were legit?), and warned us that marriage was serious business and that he adjudicated lots of divorces, and then he told us he'd give us the waiver. Then we had to go back to the office area to pick up the actual form, and to city hall where they gave us our license.

    So my advice for anyone who encounters the same problem would be that if you're really, really stuck, you'll probably be able to get the waiver.

     
    14.
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    Sugar bee
    2dBride    October 6, 2009   Washington, DC.

    Just a follow-up:  we also requested the waiver in Worcester, and got it without incident.  Our judge asked even fewer questions than yours did.  He asked us why we wanted a waiver.  We explained that we lived in Maryland, and thus had been unable to get there earlier to get the license, but that our ceremony was scheduled at Temple Shir Tikvah in Winchester for the next day.  He then told us he was granting the waiver, without asking any further questions.

     

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