has anyone else had someone kick themselves out the bridal party ?

posted 2 years ago in Emotional
Post # 2
Member
1711 posts
Bumble bee

You and your fiancé should try to take control of the situation. As hard as it may be, don’t let family members tell you what you have to do, or what’s right and what’s wrong. 

If your fiancé’s twin is constantly removing himself from the party and then putting himself back in, make up his mind for him by kicking him out for good. You may get flack from fiancé’s family for it, but the bottom line is that it’s your wedding and you’re absolutely right to do it. 

When it comes to his mom complaining about the bucks show — ignore her. As hard as it may be, that’s what your fiancé will have to do. Everything can’t revolve around one person, especially not a person who isn’t the bride or the groom. 

I’m sorry this is happening. Take the reigns, ignore the family’s nonsense, make your decisions and stick to them, and don’t fall for their “family” guilt. 

Post # 3
Member
6907 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

callifornia:  To be fair, I think it’s reasonable to expect that the bucks’ night is on a week when FI’s twin is home. I think you’re unnecessarily mixing two issues. The bridal party antics were unreasonable and childish (and in my opinion, would have been solved if your FI never let him back in the bridal party after he dropped out), but there’s no need to escalate things by excluding him from the bucks’ party.

Post # 5
Member
6907 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

callifornia:  Don’t explode at FI’s family! Your FI should be the main one handling them. If someone complains to you, tell them to talk to him, then repeat to yourself, “They’re not my problem, they’re not my problem”.

I’m not sure I agree with your FI’s approach to the bucks’ party, but in the end, he knows his brother best. It sounds like you’re backing your FI’s decision, which is exactly the right thing to do. 

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