Post # 1
I went to a party this weekend, and many of the women (all of whom have children) were bombarding me with questions about what we’ve bought, done, and prepared for little Lemon’s arrival, since it’s 10 weeks away.
I have to admit that I felt a little guilty that the only things I’ve really done are to do product research and to read some books on pregnancy, childbirth and infancy. The common response was to comment about how laid back we were, but the implication was surprise at how little we’d done!
I guess I’m the type of person that once I get onto a certain track (hello, wedding planning), I get completely obsessed… and I guess I’m not ready to go there quite yet.
Anyone else with a delayed or absent nesting instinct? When do I really need to start doing “stuff”?
Post # 3
I don’t know, I’m sure you will start doing stuff when you know it is time!!
Post # 4
My Maid/Matron of Honor that just had a baby was the same way. At her shower in December they had just painted the nursery and the furniture hadn’t even been delivered. The baby was born Feb. 11th. Everyone kinda had the same reaction but she is totally fine! She started doing stuf much closer to the due date. She said after her shower it started to feel very real and I think she really started nesting then.
Post # 5
I was just talking about this with a coworker this morning; she said the only thing she recommended doing as early as possible was buying any furniture because she had experienced a delay in the availability and although it arrived 2 weeks before her due date, she was afraid it would arrive late and it was making her nervous. I am wondering about timing, too, as it will probably be late before we get everything settled (I am only 4 months) but I wouldn’t worry too much unless it is stressing you out. Just be ready with essentials so that you (well, your husband, really) don’t have to run out to get anything – you probably won’t want to go anywhere that soon!
Post # 6
I’m due in 9 weeks and we JUST started the nursery yesterday, although we have all the furniture and decorations. We just need to actually get it all together. I have a ton of books that I read when I was first pregnant and just skipped the last few chapters because 3rd trimester and actual childbirth seemed like AGES away. I picked up one of the books last week and it actually scared me, so I put it away. I felt like it was all about how miserable and uncomfortable I would be right before delivery. Listen, I know its not going to be a walk in the park, but I think that the more you focus on the negative, the more likely you are to have a negative experience. I could definitely be more prepared in some respects, but I’m not a worrier by nature and although I’m definitely anxious about bringing the baby home (who isn’t???), I have no doubt that we will figure it all out and be great parents, even if the nursery isn’t done yet 😉
Post # 7
DG, I keep having momentary freakouts that all our baby stuff won’t be done in time! My husband is STILL finishing up the bathroom remodel, and even though I know all we need to do in the nursery is paint and arrange the furniture, it’s making me nervous. My dad’s coming up this weekend, so I really hope he’ll be almost completely done with the bathroom (and ready to start on the nursery!) by Monday.
Also, we have hardly bought anything for the baby. We already had the bigger items taken care of like the crib, rocking chair, dresser, car set/stroller, etc… But on all the essential little things, so far we have one 5-pack of white newborn onesies, two packages of diapers, and one box of baby wipes. We have a lot of stuff we need to get!
P.S. Happy 30 weeks!!!!
Post # 8
I’m 26 weeks and I haven’t really done a whole lot yet. My husband and I would have to completely rearrange our room to make space for a crib, though we do know where we want to buy one and which one we want. We’ve bought some clothes, including the coming home outfit, and received some newborn diapers through attending a program at a clinic, but that’s it.
However, my SIL (brother’s wife) and mom have found a stroller/car seat combo, which we will be picking up when we visit in a few weeks. They’ve also picked up the swing and bouncer that I wanted, so the only large items we really need are the crib (along with the mattress), changing table, and a highchair. They’ve also picked up a ton of clothes. My best friend sent me a 5-pack of white onesies and a blanket.
I’m really waiting until after my baby shower to get most of the items. We want to see what we have before we pick up other items.
Post # 9
I guess we’ve done a lot, I didn’t realize it because we were spacing it out over the pregnancy. They offer classes every Thursday at the FFSC on base, so we’ve been going to those when we can.
We have gone to three classes:
“Baby Shower” -overview of services offered on base
“Budgeting for Baby”
We plan to go to several more:
“Preparing for a Cesearian Birth” (Just in case!)
“Super Saturday Birth Class”
“Bootcamp for Dads”
“Accident Awareness and Prevention”
“Brand New Baby”
We have purchased:
Stroller (Errand stroller, not jogging)
Bedding Set (x2!! Indecision sucks!)
Some cute clothes
We have been gifted:
A basic layette
A diaper bag w/all cool stuff in it
A changing table
A high chair
A cool star maker thing
Some cute clothes
I’ve read several books throughout the pregnancy as well:
What to Expect When You’re Expecting
The Girlfriend’s Guide to Pregnancy
She’s Having a Baby – and I’m Having a Breakdown
What to Expect, the First Year
My next project is to read about birth itself:
Easy Labor: Every Woman’s Guide to Choosing Less Pain and More Joy During Childbirth
Conception, Pregnancy and Birth
Mayo Clinic Guide to a Healthy Pregnancy
The Birth Partner: A Complete Guide to Childbirth for Dads, Doulas, and All Other Labor Companions
I think that for me, action is how I deal with anxiety. It’s hard for me to be anxious about the delivery since I’m constantly reading about it and educating myself about it. I feel the same about the nursery (even though we haven’t done anything with it but buy stuff). The more I can do, the less I feel anxious. I don’t know, I’m a lot like you. Once I get into something, I go full bore. It just happened to me early because we had some problems and I got nervous about BabyMighty and making sure I was doing everything right. So I jumped down the rabbit hole, and what you’ve read above is the result of my new obsession!
Post # 10
If it makes you feel better, a couple that have a that daughter attends the same school as the girl I nanny for recently adopted a baby and they literally had NOTHING for the baby. They were on a wait list for like two years and didn’t know when a child would be available. They got a call one day and basically they said come pick her up and take her home tomorrow! She was 4 days old when they brought her home and she slept in a laundry basket the first night. Luckily a lot of people in the community pitched in to help get them stuff ASAP, and I’m sure it was a stressful couple of days, but it all worked out for them in the end and the baby is no worse off as a result.
Post # 11
We have been delayed a bit but not because we want to. The nursery is currently being used by my Father-In-Law as his office, so that being said we held off on buying too much baby stuff as it has no home. We told him we would like the room to be ours by April 1 so I can go to town on it. Unfortuantely, yesterday was the first day he tired moving things so slowly but surely I am seeing it become ours.
We have bought a few things and a few things were purchased for us already and it is all being stored in our living room.
We bought the stroller system – it was sold out at 3 different places so when I went to Amazon they had it so we hurried up and purchased it. All other things are toys and clothes and toy chest that my Mother-In-Law purchased.
Post # 12
Alright, so knowing that I really, really am behind, I went ahead and signed up for our birth classes. (I should have done this WAY sooner, since most of them were full and we had to take some goofy times). I also did most of our registry.
Previously we already had all the baby clothes washed. (Really, how many clothes does a kid need?)
So we’re moving forward… but I’m thinking more about getting the house painted and on the market and getting my work deadlines met!