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I'm in the same boat. We're getting married in four and a half months and just got approved for a home loan yesterday (meaning, we're going to start seriously looking next week.)
A lot of people say it's crazy but we've got 90% of the wedding planned already, so we're pretty much just sitting on our hands until mid-march anyway. I think a lot of the people that would yell "oh no, you absolutely cannot do that!!" are the same ones that insist they need 1+ years to plan a wedding, monetary issues aside.
I guess we'll see!
We are as well. What's worse is we have to SELL a house while planning!
That is more work as we had to clean up a lot of little detail areas, replace carpet, paint the house etc. I have an open house today so I have cleaned pretty much all night and now I have to haul 2 of the 4 cats to my work and then ride around with the dogs for awhile.
Looking at houses to buy was rather fun, and the financing isn't a lot of work, so I don't see why it is such a big deal.
All in all, it makes us very busy, esp since FI has been gone hunting for about 2-3 weeks out of the past few months. But we need a house, so what other option is there? I am NOT going back to renting as it is silly to pay someone ELSE'S mortgage for them.
We planned our wedding and bought a house at the same time. It's do-able, just really stressful. We started looking for a house in February and closed by June. Only advice I really have for this is make a wish list of what you want in a house and don't waste time going to see houses that don't fit (or mostly fit). Don't go see houses out of your budget assuming the seller will negotiate down. This will save you time and energy.
We just bought a house this summer and we have been planning our wedding since march. I can definately atest to the fact that it can be extremely stressful at times. I don't think we realized how many "extra" expenses that come with a new house. We have had random bills popping up everywhere or the last three months and its not little stuff. Like a thousand here and seven hundred extra here...It is a lot...We are scrimping and saving to make everything work.
With that said, I would not change a thing. We wanted more space and a home of our own and we have made it work. I often find that when you discuss things like this with people, there is a lot of negativity and you need to do what is best for YOU and your SO, not whats best for everyone else. Just keep your budget strict and make you that you have an extra pocket of cash in case you get those extra surprise bills like we have. Good luck and enjoy house hunting :)
We're in the process right now too - it's definitely a little trickier in terms of your time management skills, but it's also really fun to have a few things to do - keeps me more sane, especially when I need a break from wedding planning!
Well, the fact that so many people have done it and are here to tell the tale is proof that not only is it possible, at the end of it all you'll have your own house. Yay! I'm in the opposite boat of selling our house and planning the wedding. Frankly, I'm about to lose my mind because I'm a home stager by profession and I'm the sort who runs around literally picking lint up off the floor and worrying about what kinds of books are stacked up artfully at my bedside (must banish all the chick lit :) every time I get a call from the Realtor that she wants to set up a showing. Which has been often.
But I will say that trying to do both has made me definitely more focused and organized. And you are forced to let the little things slide because you don't have the luxury of time, especially if you want to get out of your parents' house :) As a PP said, don't waste time on houses that you know in your heart and gut will not work for you. It's not really an ideal situation, but you can make it work in your favor. Good luck!
We did it. People say buying a house and planning a wedding are two of the most stressful things you can do. True story:). I wouldnt trade it for anything. We bought and remodeled a foreclosure while planning. We had stressful moments but now, we ate married, settled in our new home, and can relax and just enjoy peace :). I'm so glad we did it before we were married.
If you're starting now, and your wedding isnt until next july, I think you have enough time to handle both and keep your sanity, especially if you've done a lot of the wedding stuff already. The house buying fiasco is only really stressful if you feel rushed, and during the negotiations which maybe last a week or two. We spent every weekend for about 3 months looking for a venue or looking at houses, and sometimes both on the same day if they were near each other! Its definitely doable, and will be such a relief after you have the house. But just realize that its not all over once you have the house, its just starting... the house is a lot of work!! We got a great condition newish house, but for some reason, theres always something that has to be done!
I guess everyone's situation is a bit different. We were able to do it successfully - we closed on our home a month before our wedding. It was definitely stressful - we were worried about finances with the wedding then on top of it decided to buy a house. But it was 100% worth it in the end! After the wedding and honeymoon we got to come back to our first home. It is so much better than renting. I would definitely recommend buying a home + planning the wedding if you 1) have the finances and 2) have the organizational skills.
We got engaged January of 2009, started looking at houses in May, Closed in August and then got married in April of 2010. I think it worked out fine for us because we had a longish engagement. I remember finally finding the house and putting in an offer and then realizing we hadn't nailed down out venue yet, so we hopped to it.
I think as long as you have the cash flow for it, it can definitely work out. One thing that almost threw us off track was that I had gotten a new credit card to put wedding stuff on (it had 0 interest for the first year). Watch out for stuff like that because once the bank pulls your credit to give you a loan approval, they don't like anything to change. It worked out great for us though!
We got engaged in June, bought a house (process took from Aug-Oct including search, purchase, and move), and then got married the following June.
We were in our house for about 8 months before the wedding but I still think its do-able!
I'm doing both right now. We're getting married next October and we close on our house in a week!!!!! Strangely enough, the only thing stressing me out is that I have to move right before Christmas and I'm a Christmas person so I love to decorate and I'm a little sad that I won't get much more than a tree up this year.
We started looking at houses seriously back in April, right before the tax credit ran out and we almost bought when then, but FH got cold feet on it so we backed out and I'm glad we did. The house we're getting is a) bigger b) has more features that we liked c) in the community we want and d) feels like home. Yes it's going to cost us more, but FH sister will be living in the detached in-law apartment and paying rent to help defray the mortgage cost.
Words of advice: definitely figure out what's most important to you in the house, whether its a nice garage, basement, a second bathroom and then figure out where you have wiggle room - fireplaces, room size, etc. The house we are buying has almost everything on our wish list, except that the bedrooms are small and funky shaped. Also, figure out what you can afford to pay on a mortgage, but also factor in utilities, especially if you're not paying them yourself currently.
Try to pay down your debt to improve your credit score so that you can get the lowest rate possible. (in between April and now, I paid off my car and paid down a bit on my credit cards) Don't be afraid to research different types of mortgage programs. Here in Massachusetts, if you buy in a more rural town, you can get a specialized loan for like 103% with no PMI needed. We don't qualify, but in our initial search, we limited ourselves to such towns and didn't really find what we were looking for.
Also, when it's time to move, label your "wedding boxes" on every side so you know exactly what's in them, and move them yourself if need be.
Oh, and, if you're hesitant, even a tiny bit, don't. I know how alluring the idea of your own home and own space can be after living in apartments or with family can be. BUT, it may be far, far better to move into a cheap tiny apartment and save the difference between your rent and anticipate mortgage cost so when you are ready, you have the funds. Best of luck to you!
You can absolutely do this if you want to. You don't necessarily need to be pre-approved to look as you may not become pre-approved without a property in mind.
Thanks all! I will just play it by ear. We meet with our potential realtor tonight! We visited some open houses yesterday - it was very exciting!
We did. The house buying process was scary at first because it was such a big purchase. I had to move over 8 hours away from home. I think it was harder for me to move than it was to house hunt and buy the house. I came in town to visit FH for about a week. Within that time, I had to pick the house and we had to agree. I went back home and we discussed it for a few more weeks. We brought it about two weeks later.
We are doing it all at once, and we're long distance to! We went out house shopping a couple of weeks ago and found a house that we absolutely love, and actually right now my FI is in our realtor's office negotiating our way through an offer and counteroffer and by the end of the evening we might have our dream house! This weekend I am visiting reception venues, and so hopefully in short order we will have a wedding date (probably in April or May) and a house. We've accepted that this is going to be a big year for us, and lots of changes, but that we will take things one step at a time and keep calm.
I am in the same boat. We started the house hunt back in March, got engaged in May, and the wedding is next September. We are in the process of countering with the sellers. I do understand that it is stressful planning and searching for a home. I think it depends on the couple. If you and your FI have a lot of energy, I say go for it.
I've had to make a lot of sacrafices, we cut down our social life tremendously and start to really save our money. Sometimes I feel like I am missing out on things with friends but I realize that none of them are in the same boat as me. I know what I want and I'll do what I have to do to get it done.
So happy wedding planning and good luck with the house search!
We are doing it, it has been pretty smooth sailing. The only hard thing to swallow is it feels like we are bleeding money, but it so worth it in the end. Just be organized. I have so many lists and notebooks, but it has kept me on top of every detail. Also if the house needs work, really find people you trust, even if they are not the cheapest. That pieces of mind is priceless so ask your friends and family if they have people they have worked with.
My husband and I did that. We got engaged in August and got married in March, and in the meantime we went under contract on a house in January and closed in May.
It can definitely be done.
My sis and her husband did it. They closed on Sept 1st of this year and were married on September 18th. It was stressful but they are now married and settled with the wedding and everything behind them. You have to plan and budget to the nth degree but it can be done.
We did it. We had a long engagement and we rented the house out for 1 year to a nice couple. Helped us pay for the mortgage and the wedding. The downpayment is a killer though. Make sure you do a budget for both home costs and wedding costs and see what numbers you come up with. If you're feeling comfy with those numbers, go for it. Getting those house keys is the best feeling!
Last year, we got engaged in Feb. then started looking for a home, and we closed in May.
Got married in pretty big wedding in October.
It worked out well with a good plan for the move (packing for a week and moving quickly with a bunch of help on one day). I moved in first (I had most of the furniture etc) and FI (now DH) moved his stuff slowly and didn't actually live there til the wedding, which was a nice transition time.
So...Month 1- 2 was pre-planning for the wedding (To-do lists, timelines, getting a process/team in place to help, venue reservations, invite design, website, gown)
Month 3- 4 was loan and house stuff (I was kinda burned out from wedding stuff already).
Month 5-8 I worked on the wedding stuff in a very systematic way using all the prep work from earlier on. You can do this!
I say go for it..in the end, you'll have a house and a husband :) For us, we got engaged November 2009, bought a house, and will be married July 30, 2011 (the same day as you!!) It is a long engagement and that helps, but being a homeowner is stressful (to say the least). Money becomes an even bigger issue than ever before and it can take a toll on the relationship at times. But, you get over it and keep the focus on wedding planning :) Our home still doesn't have much furniture in the rooms or decorations since we're waiting for the gifts from the wedding!! I'd even think you guys are in a better position, having most of the planning done, you can furnish your new home quickly once you start getting your gifts! You wont have to be like me and use hand me downs for a year and a half in an empty house!! Good Luck!
I'm RIGHT in the middle of doing this right now. Its stressful, but I Think it will work out. We're getting married in May, and we were hoping to time our house-buying to right before the wedding (since I graduate from school in April and will be switching from part time to full time right after the honeymoon). But we found a place we like, and are trying to find away to make it all work now! The last week has been SO crazy with house stuff - so i'm glad we're not doing it a month before the wedding!
We planned a wedding, lived with my parents while waiting for our house to be built and I started my first year of teaching. We also lost my nana 5 weeks before the wedding, so we pretty much had the top most stressful things happen ALL in one year.
All you can do is think about how great its all going to be in the long run. And delegate as much as you can to other people. I handed EVERYTHING to do with the house over to the fella, so he handled all the phone calls to the site manager, emails from the building company, bank etc. I also tried to get as much done for the wedding in advance, and for me, doing wedding stuff was kinda my hobby - a way of destressing after work!
Also, try and split things up into small achieveable tasks, so it's not so overwhelming. I decided to sort out our favours one weekend, put them all together and popped them in a box where they sat for a good 5 months just waiting to go!
We've had a lot on our plates this year, and it was funny cos my mum actually mentioned it in her speech at our wedding, about how we've tackled more things in a year than most people do in 5 and that we've got through it together with a smile on our faces - it was nice!
Our wedding was 2 weeks ago, we're looking like moving into our house in two weeks and it's only another 3 weeks til the end of my first school year! Next year's going to be a breeze! LOL
Yes- start the process now. Our wedding was October 2, we decided to move back home from AZ to MI in August about 6 weeks before the big day. We waited until after the honeymoon (mid-October) to start looking for a house and I wish we had started earlier in August or September.
Our offer was accepted on November 9 so we are under contract right now and will probably close before Christmas. I am going crazy living with my parents because we have been here since August. There is a lot of downtime during escrow, so had we started earlier we could've been in our place months ago mowithout causing too much additional stress.
@afuturemrsl: We originally were going to wait until after the wedding, but interest rates and home prices were perfect. We were also living with my mom at the time, and we also had to move out and either rent or buy. We purchased our house about 6 months before our wedding. Sure things were hectic at times, but it wasn't as much as I expected.
I ended up being really happy we did it this way. It was nice to have our presents sent to our new home instead of having to pack and store them. It was also great coming home from the honeymoon to our own place. The best thing was nto dealing with an aaprtment while we bought- coordianting move ou dates, packing etc. Because we were living with my mom, we didn't have to worry as much about timelines with leases.
The only downsides I felt, were we did have to sacrifice our weekends for a bit, between vendor appointments and open houses. But, it was completely worth it. The other downside is being excited about the new home and not having time to work on projects. It's been 8 months and there are still rooms we need to paint and a bathroom to remodel, but I'd rather hold off on those than hold off on the purchase of the house.
Good luck with te realtor! :)
We got married on 8/8/08,, started house hunting in april of that year bought the house a week before the wedding!!! talk about stress. Anyway, once we bought the house I was more into renovating/painting etc, than the wedding! It can be done and the best part is having a house after getting married.
We did it. We moved about 15 days before our wedding and there was one time I said to my husband, "we shouldn't have done both!" but it was in the heat of the moment. You just....get things done. That's all.
Go for it! Engagement, Farm Purchase, and Wedding, all in 6 months!
I really would like to buy a house a few months before getting married. I just want to be settled and hate throwing money away on rent. But, we are both looking to transition in our jobs in the next year, so I know it probably isn't wise, unless we find great jobs locally in the next year, to do so. I think like some people say if you can swing it financially, do it! What would be better than being in your home right before/after your wedding, as hubby and wife, and having a stationary place to put all your new stuff and decorate as a married couple!
We bought a home and planned a wedding-totally do-able but highly stressful.
Our closing date was June 1st and our wedding was June 26. The good news is you've got a great advantage over other home buyers in that you are not selling a home. You have a lot more flexibility with closing dates and you don't have to stress about carrying two mortgages.
My best advice to you: start looking early. Finding the perfect home takes time and in our case, we were involved in several bidding wars. We looked at something like 30 homes which was a lot more than we expected. Having lots of time will allow you to take a few mental breaks as well. The house buying experience can be absolutely overwhelming and sometimes you need to take a step back and stop looking at houses for a few days/weeks.
Good luck, and try and have some fun.
my FI and I live in an aprtment together now. we got engaged in Nov and plan on having the wedding in aug. our lease runs out April 1st so we decided to look at a few houses. We found a house today that we love. its functional for us, its in a great neighborhood and it feels like a home. The only problem we have ran into is that we must be legally married in order to get the loan that we want due to the benefits of it. so we have gone from engaged and staying in this apartment to buying a house and getting legally married in about 2-3 weeks time! very stressful with decision making. its not how we planned for things to happen. but we must get hitched in order to get the house loan we want.
I did it! It's totally doable. It was frustrating at times but I really didn't think it was nearly as overwhelming as a lot of people say. I got married in July (2010) and we started house hunting in January 2010. We ended up going under contract in April, closing in May, and spending the rest of May and June painting and moving our stuff in while we did the last minute wedding plans.
I changed jobs in June as well. I'm a teacher so I didn't have to technically work during the summer but going to job interviews and sending out resumes was almost as time consuming as my job at times! And then trying to get all of my benefits transfered and send my official "resignation" to my old job and all of that junk... It was an interesting summer to say the least :)
I actually thought it was easier because I didn't have to "store" all of the stuff we got at our showers until we moved. After each bridal shower, I took everything we got straight over to the house and added it to all of the other stuff we were slowly trying to move in.
Good luck!
We bought the house first. It was stressful but most of the stress came from all the paperwork and such before moving in. Be prepared it's a lot of providing information and meeting back and forth. We didn't know this before hand. At the time of wedding: Surprise we were pregnant! Found out only 1 week after moving into new home. Total stressful time. But as far as wedding went we were like already married so not much changed regarding post wedding.
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. You just have to plan, plan, plan.
Can someone give me some perspective? - we are attempting to start the process of buying a house. We are getting married July 30. We have gotten a lot of things done for the wedding already . . .
(P.S. I am living with my parents so we either need to rent or buy. We can't live with them much longer for my own sanity!)
I was reading some boards with people STRONGLY discouraging to do both at the same time. Anyone do it successfully?