(Closed) Has anyone planned a wedding without making friends or family mad

posted 6 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
667 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

 I do not think it is possible really, but just breathe and let it roll off your back. You do not give a F**K. That is my attitude anyway. 

Post # 3
1917 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

I think it is pretty much impossible, because I have been plenty mad during the planning process, not to mention other people involved.

Post # 4
1628 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

When I read the title of the thread I heard in my head “INCONCEIVABLE!” in the voice of Wallace Shawn from The Princess Bride…

Seriously, you may never know that someone was mad or sad or hurt or confused, but someone out there IS. Usually it is pretty minor.  Hopefully they have the good grace to realize it’s not a personal sleight and get over it on their own, but I don’t think it’s possible to not hurt/offend/anger at least one guest/vendor/family member/friend/random-acquantice-who-feels-entitled-to-an-invite-and-a-plus-one-despite-them-not-knowing-your-FIs-name.

Post # 5
5075 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2012

It’s not possible.  No matter what you do someone is going to get upset.  

Post # 6
1319 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

I don’t know of anyone who was angry about my wedding choices. I like it that way. I wasn’t going to change them, so I would’ve felt badly.

Post # 7
10288 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011

I don’t think we made anyone mad but even if we did, we never knew about it. Actually, everyone was very understanding and accomidating. We had some strict rules (like NO kids with the exception of Bridal Party and OOT) and not a single person complained or tried to go against our wishes. It helped that we had a small guest list (85 invited) so we didn’t have as many opinions to deal with. Many of our friends and family have either recently married or have attended a plethora of weddings so they know how it is.

ETA: Actually, we did make one person mad. DH’s grandmother took it as a “personal insult” that we didn’t seat her granddaughters at the same table as her. Her granddaughters (DH’s cousins) were seated at the “kids table” which was directly next to where angry granny was told to park it. To be honest, I laughted my ass off when I found out how pissed off she was. If I had to do it all over again (re: my seating chart), I wouldn’t change a thing. 

Post # 9
1747 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I thought I would be able to get away with not hurting anyone’s feelings, but you would be suprised how many feelings everyone has! It’s like each individual has a jumble of feelings about your wedding and you have to move around those feelings like you’re playing the game, “Operation”.

Post # 10
264 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I just posted a rant along these same lines. I don’t think it is possible to plan a wedding without offending anyone, unless you have endless amounts of money or unlimited space at a venue. I hate the feeling of upsetting people, but at least my Fiance is the firm one. But I still feel sick to my stomach about the thought of making someone angry with me.

Post # 11
396 posts
Helper bee

I agree with everyone else – it’s not possible.

At this point makes me not want to plan a wedding anymore with the amount of crap I’m dealing from others.

Post # 12
637 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

I can honestly say, unless you have unlimited money, someone is going to get upset no matter what you do, just never good enough.

Thank god we don’t have any bridal party drama yet, and I don’t foresee one.  So far just conflicts with family but it’s mostly sorted out now.  But more problems probably will come along once the out of country guests arrive.  You know how some picky relatives are, especially those with HIGH expectations. 

I will try to accommodate as much as I could, within my power.  But given so much limits of headcounts, money…etc…something is not going to be perfect.  Fiance is more firm on the planning.  We are pretty reasonable on accommodation so we can’t invite some guests, we really can’t.  So if family not happy about the arragenemtn, they are welcome not to come.  (my Fiance even said it to his parents ><) 

I will say wedding planning is never easy but you will hope people will get over it eventually, preferrably prior to the wedding date. 🙂

Post # 13
7904 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

impossible, I think.

Post # 14
2651 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

I am going with No.

And this is how I am beginging to feel about everyone’s opinion, except for Fiance and possibly the bees ( WARNING BAD LANGUAGE AHEAD!)


Post # 15
364 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

@lamkky:  Even if you DID have unlimited money, there would probably be someone out there mad about the WAY the money was spent.. and there is always plain old interpersonal nonsense!

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