Post # 1
So, a simple question. Have you ever cheated while in a relationship? I am not talking about a phase when you were ”dating around” or something.. Everyone knows what a serious relationship is and when something is considered cheating . This is usually a touchy subject and people try to explain themselves (”it was not a good relationship”, ”he was not good to me ”etc) , this is not necessary in this case and this is not meant to be a judgemental post. I just ask to see what percentage of bees have done it and what do you think is the best policy when we come to this? Do you think someone should tell their partner or not? I am only talking about something sexual that has nothing to do with feelings. I added a poll, so that bees who have done it in their current relationship can answer too because I don’t think that they would be comfortable answering this publicly..
To answer this myself, yes I have done it in a past relationship. It was a one night stand and purely sexual. The siple truth is that I couldn’t control myslef. I wish I had a better excuse , but I am being honest. I never told my ex and we broke up for entirely different reasons..
Post # 2
sweetis: no. Never tempted to do it either.
i have been with DH for 10 years, married for 1 year. He is the only person I have been with in all that time.
To answer your question, yes I think the cheating spouse should tell their SO/DH/DW. They deserve to know, they should be given the option if they want to stsy with someone who has been u faithful especially when a vow has been made to be faithful. One of the key parts of any relationship is trust, and you trust a person with your heart and not to hurt you. So when a person cheats, they need to be honest and tell the truth, bc if you don’t they are being selfish and living with this lie of being faithful bc they know that when the spouse hears that he/she has been unfaithful, there is a big chance the relationship will be over
Post # 3
No. Never been tempted to either.
I’ve been cheated on before and knowing how that feels is a huge deterrent.
Post # 4
Once. I was in high school and I was a dumb kid. Never again.
Post # 5
Yes we because SO insisted on a celibate relationshiop because the health quacks he was consulting with said that sex was “enervating” him and sex with a non vegetarian was affecting his health (osmosis??) Silly me, I should have just broken up when this continued for over year and not just found a friend with benefits.
Post # 6
sweetis: Yes. The guy I cheated with is now my husband.
Post # 7
Aquaria: Is he ever insecure? Like you would do that to him too?
Post # 8
sweetis: No, never cheated & never been tempted to do it. I just never let my relationships get to the point (if I wasn’t happy in it) to go out and cheat on my SO (at the time).
Post # 9
sweetis: No, we have a much deeper relationship than the high school fling I cheated on. Actually we’re all still friends!
Post # 10
I did cheat.. but, not on a relationship that I cared about. We were pretty much coming to an end so it was my way of letting it go. I cheated, and then phoned him to tell him we were over.
Post # 11
Cheated in a past relationship. We worked through it and I broke up with him a couple of years later after I realised what issues that led me to cheat…I was unfulfilled and unhappy.
Post # 12
sweetis: Nope. Never cheated and never been tempted to. I don’t allow myself to get in situations where I can’t control myself. I also believe there’s different types of cheating. I think of emotional cheating as just as bad as physical cheating–I would never allow any relationship to get to that point.
I had a friend who regularly cheated on her boyfriend and I could just never understand why she didn’t move on from him. She wasn’t happy with him, but stayed with him for four years. I tried not to judge, but I’m human, and cheating is something that’s simply against my moral code. I can’t condone it, no matter what excuse or situation you’re in. I think if you’re cheating, it’s beyond irresponsible to not let your partner know–what if you contract an STD!?
Post # 13
Never cheated but have been cheated on.
I think the cheating partner should always confess to their SO. It would be kinder than the SO finding out another way.
Post # 14
In a very problematic past relationship and that’s all I’m gonna say.
Post # 15
No. If the relationship was bad enough for me to consider finding someone else, I would leave it. I have been cheated on in the past and I refuse to ever put someone else through that pain.