Have you ever experienced an orgasm?

posted 3 years ago in Intimacy
Post # 3
Member
237 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

I don’t think that this is necessarily an innapropriate question. However, I do think it may require more of an anatomy sesion and deeper discussion than is appropriate for a public forum. 🙂

Having the big O can be challenging, espcially when your body is not used to the physical intimacy between a husband and wife. The first thing I would suggest is not to rush things when you two are together. Spend a lot of time exploring one another, touching, and then once things are heated up, give that a go.

Pressing down is likely causing clitoral stimulation. The contractions may or may not be an orgasm. I’ve heard them described in different ways. Sometimes they last a few seconds, and sometimes a lot longer. 

I’m sure there are some great books out there – I was not one who saved myself for marriage, so unfortunately, I can’t name any. Not every woman get can get there by penetration alone.

Best of luck, and like I said, take your time with each other. 🙂 

Post # 5
Member
7208 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@wearetheones22:  Welcome to the Bee, and congrats for waiting! Even though other forums might be better, I find you can get a lot of honest female advice here.

I like to recommend this site: http://themarriagebed.com It is especially aimed at Christians who wait for marriage, but it is would be useful to anyone.

What you had might have been an orgasm. Most women (including me) find the best way is by stimulating the clitoris. If it’s not against your beliefs, I suggest you try it yourself (alone) so you know where to tell your husband to touch. Then when making love, get your husband to stimulate you there, as part of foreplay. In fact, see if he can bring you to orgasm before the actual penetration. Like @Daenaria727:  said, many women cannot orgasm from penetration alone, so it might be a bit ambitious to try for that before you’re sure you can orgasm from clitoral stimulation.

Post # 6
Member
1627 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I think your vagina was pulsing and while that feels good, I can’t tell you if that’s an orgasm. I havr had the most pleasurable sex with my husband. I think I orgasmed once. The love making that night was awesome abd I cried.

Post # 7
cherrypieBee
1059 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2008 - A tiny town just outside of Glacier National Park

Vaginal contractions from orgasm are often (but not exclusively) powerful and overwhelming. You can have a small, subtle orgasm, but I think for most people, when you have one, it’s unmistakable. I can cause small residual contractions from tensing and releasing my pelvic floor, and these are pleasant, but very different from the powerful, unstoppable wave of an orgasm.

And, trust me, orgasms can take work to achieve and even more work to have regularly. It even takes practice to learn to surrender so that your body can really let go into its own power.

As other posters have said, it’s worth investigating on your own so you can help your husband with gentle guidance get to know your body. Direct clitoral stimulation with hand, faucet/shower head, or vibrator is usually the best approach!

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