having mixed emotions… (long)

posted 3 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
738 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@MrsDaSani:  I don’t think Mr. Dime would make a good husband candidate.  Regardless of why he married Mrs. Dime (this case for children) he should value his marriage and clearly he is not if he is texting Ms. Penny.  I think if Ms. Penny did act like a homewrecker and was successful then she would constantly have to worry about having the same thing happen to her.  Obviously he did not care for her if during the separation he got someone else pregnant.

Post # 4
434 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2013 - Tybee Island, GA

@MrsDaSani:  I agree with PP.

Mr.Quarter all the way. He doesnt deserve to be doubted on!!!

Post # 5
538 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@MrsDaSani:  you know exactly what to do, Mr. Dime is married… the end. Stay away form him before you ruin what you currently have.

Post # 6
3394 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

@MrsDaSani:  I think in your mind you miss what you had with Mr. Dime because you only remember the good things. He still was fine with dating other people and it was you that was unsure about him. He also apparently had no problem getting his pants down. Everything that never was can seem perfect in your mind. And now he’s a very real married man with ibviously no respect for the institution of marriage. Please move on.

Post # 7
1634 posts
Bumble bee

What about Mr. Dime makes Ms. Penny doubt what she has with Mr. Quarter? To me, it sounds like Mr. Dime made a poor choice and knows it, and wants Ms. Penny back, but why exactly does Ms. Penny even consider it? She knew back then that he wasnt the one, what has changed, besides the fact that he doesnt respect his wife and Ms. Penny’s decision to marry another man enough to leave well enough alone? I think we all want the “movies romance” but guess what? Those are fictional. They never show you what happens after the big dramatic scene because its boring, messy, and complicated and that doesnt make for a good romance movie… or marriage 😉 stick with Mr. Quarter girl, you have a good thing and you said yourself you love him with every ounce of yourself… dont doubt that cause some dumb boy stuck his nose in for a second!

Post # 8
1584 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@MrsDaSani:  I think this is a fairly common occurrence – an ex pops up that you have unfinished business with, right when things in your life couldn’t get much better.
I think you need to forget about Mr. Dime, tell him you are very happy with Mr. Quarter, and that he should be respectful of your decision.

Mr. Dime seems to be experiencng a case of wanting what he can’t have, and as flattering as it may feel, you did break up for a reason, and you even say yourself, you are head over heels for Mr. Quarter, so stop letting Mr. Dime into your head!

Post # 9
8513 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

Neither one sounds like the right for you.

If you really were ready to marry Mr. Quarter you wouldn’t be fantasizing about another man coming along and sweeping you away.  Honestly, I don’t think those type of (serious) doubts are normal.

If Mr. Dime is married and you’re only remembering the good stuff.  What happened years ago doesn’t matter, he’s not the same person and you’re not either.  You broke up with him for a REASON.  That reason is because he wasn’t right for you.  You have no idea what your relationship would be like now.  I don’t know how long you were separated when he knocked someone up but he obviously was having a fine time without you.

Post # 10
2562 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

I think you need to block all contact with Mr. Dime.

I don’t know why he’s suddenly getting in touch with you, but he is a MARRIED COIN looking to rekindle a relationship with his ex… so what would happen if you were in the-now-Mrs. Dime’s shoes… would he get bored with his marriage and find another coin?

You’re in no danger of being a homewrecker, he is… he’s the married one.
Stay far, far away from that type. People change and not always for the better.

If you are happy with what you have, cherish it and don’t look back.



Post # 11
10219 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

Hi Ms. Penny… Welcome to “the Hive”

(BTW you need to set up an account for yourself, because “sharing an account” is against the TOS, and could get @MrsDaSani: in trouble with the Mods… or see this post Deleted… Not that I am going to report it… just thought you’d want to know WHY incase it suddenly disappears.)

I am an Encore Bride and Older Bee here on WBee

I am known to “shoot from the hip”

Which means sometimes people don’t always like what I have to say (and you might be one of those people)

It is good that you have found it in your heart to cut ties with Mr. Dime and allow him to move on with his life / baby with Ms. Nickel.  That was truly the HONOURABLE thing to do.

Moving on with your own life was very important.  So you did the right thing there by going on to date Mr Quarter

Mr Quarter sounds like a great man, and I am happy to hear you two are now Engaged.

I am not so happy to hear that Mr Dime is still texting you. You truly should have shut that sh!t down firmly with him instead of letting it continue.

Having “some” doubts before one marries is normal… altho those doubts usually revolve around the ability to make such a HUGE commitment

Or what I call “the holy-fuck it is FOREVER factor”… “Do I really & truly KNOW what I am doing ??”

Your doubts bother me… because they don’t sound like those types of doubts

You are clearly romanticizing your relationship with Mr Dime

Mr Dime is very much a troubled man…

He went on to date other women, got one pregnant, continued to maintain a friendship with you, got married, kept communications with your going, and professes his LOVE to you

This may all sound romantic, but in reality, he is a man that doesn’t know his own mind… if he isn’t stringing you along for the last several years, he’s been stringing HIS WIFE along as well.

He is not marriage material… so you can sweep that idea right out of your mind !!

He is not ready for marriage, he is a type of player, that is often seen in men of his age (early to mid 20s).  Guarantee you if you and him were to hook up, or even marry, he’d be claiming boredom / confusion within a few months.  He has a lot of growing up to do.  Don’t waste any energy on him !!

Now back to Mr Quarter.  He sounds like a real catch.  And you are lucky to have met him.

BUT I must tell you, that I don’t think you should be planning to marry him any time soon.


When you truly are in LOVE you will see no one else, there will be no others.  There will be no such wondering Questions.  Just doesn’t happen

At 22 you “may think you love him”… but trust me you don’t.

If you marry this man Mr Quarter you will be disappointed as he isn’t the Knight in Shining Armour that you are looking for to truly sweep you off your feet (cause if he was that Knight you wouldn’t be wondering about the Stable Boy… that Mr Dime is)

You are fantasizing about a Wedding… not grounded in a what a Marriage, and a lifetime of FOREVER truly means.

You need to do all the Characters in this Shakespearean Tragedy a favour, and call off this Wedding.

You need to tell Mr Dime to STOP his contact with you

You need to tell Mr Quarter that you are not ready for marriage… cause you HONESTLY DO NOT KNOW YOUR SELF

And then you need to take a nice long break from the Dating Pool to spend some serious time getting to know WHO YOU ARE and WHO YOU WANT TO BE

At 22 there is still a lot of your 20s in front of you… and lots of important life changing experiences that you haven’t lived yet.

Time for some major growth.

Don’t tie yourself down to marriage at 22 when you clearly aren’t ready for the commitment… you will regret it for years and years to come (more so if there are kids in the future)

Divorce sucks… the worst thing in the whole world.  I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy… so I certainly wouldn’t wish it on you.

I wish to spare you that horrible heartache.

Tell Mr Quarter that you love him dearly… but that you truly need more time to discover the YOU that lurks within.

Hope this helps,

PS… You cannot meet MR WONDERFUL if you are tied down to Mr OK or wondering about Mr DANGEROUS

Mr Wonderful is so much more… and all 3 of you deserve more than what you all have right now !!


Post # 12
2179 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2024

Dude is MARRIED and you are ENGAGED.

Mr. Dime only wants what he can’t have. He knows you are happy and engaged and he’s probably miserable and wants to go back to a time when he lived a carefree life (with you). DON’T DO IT! It ended for a reason, no need to look back. Tell him to NEVER contact you again and block his number. If you love your FI as much as you say then you’ll do this.

Post # 13
451 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

@kes18:  If you really were ready to marry Mr. Quarter you wouldn’t be fantasizing about another man coming along and sweeping you away.  Honestly, I don’t think thosetype of (serious) doubts are normal.


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