Post # 1
So this morning on my way out the door, I gave my fiance one small task – I asked him to think of a song for the mother/son dance. His reply was “do we have to do a mother/son dance?” I was like “don’t you want to dance with your mom?” and he said “I don’t know….” Then he was grumbling about it. Now, he’s not close to his mom at all, and I think some things happened between his mom and dad when he was younger and he doesn’t have much respect for his mom. I am super close to my dad and I want to do a father/daughter dance. What if he says no to the mother/son dance? I can’t do one without the other, can I? It will last three minutes – he can’t dance with his mom for three minutes?? I don’t know what to do. Anyone else had this problem???
Post # 3
Dont push it. You can absolsutely do a father/daughter dance if he doesnt do one with his mom. If their relationship is that strained, the tension and awkwardness on teh floor wll translate and the guests will definitely know. Let it be and let him make the decision, you go ahead with your dance with your dad
Post # 4
I’ve been to weddings where there was only a father/daughter dance and where neither the bride nor the groom have danced with a parent. It was fine either way. I haven’t been to one where only the groom danced with his mom but I’m sure that’s okay too.
If it’s important for you to dance with your dad (like it is for me too!) then make sure you do. And if your husband-to-be doesn’t want to dance with his mom and that’s important to him then don’t insist that he does. Especially when he has his reasons. I wouldn’t ask FI to dance with his mom if he didn’t want to because I wouldn’t want him to be uncomfortable.
I agree with KellyV – it’s much better to skip it than to see a strained or uncomfortable mom/son on the dancefloor.
Post # 5
If he says no, you can still have yours! I’ve been to a few weddings where only the father and daughter danced. I didn’t even knwo about mother-son dances until weddingbee
Post # 6
eh, it’s not a big deal. I think your guests will appreciate getting to get on the dance floor more quickly anyway.
Post # 7
If your fiance decides not to dance with his mom, you can definitely still do the Father-Daughter dance. I don’t have a relationship with my dad and didn’t invite him–so the whole Father-Daughter dance definitely wasn’t happening at my wedding. However, it was really important to my husband to dance with his mom. I thought about asking another relative, but it just sort of felt forced. Instead, he danced with his mom and that was that. No one even really mentioned it to me that they danced and I didn’t dance with anyone.
You definitely CAN have one without the other!
Post # 8
Thanks ladies! This makes me feel much better! You bet I will be out there dancing with my daddy!
Post # 9
I agree with everyone else, I wouldn’t push it. I will not have a father/daughter dance but my boyfriend definitely wants a mother/son dance. My situation is I don’t necessarily have a bad relationship with my dad, but we’re not close and it would feel awkward. I also have a stepfather who was way more involved in my life but not until i was 11 or 12 so I’d feel weird about choosing to dance with him over my father, especially in front of my fathers parents who I am extremely close with. I know that if i felt pushed into doing it I’d feel resentful and the whole thing would be awkward. I say do what you each feel comfortable with and don’t worry about traditions, they’re like rules… meant to be broken 🙂