- 5 years ago
- Wedding: June 2015
I love the holidays, but the lure of the season and engagements popping up everywhere always seem to create a lot of “engagement hype” for me. This Christmas is the third of our relationship where I thought a proposal might be happening. The cycle of hope and excitement turning into let down is a major bummer. What’s worse is that I have to gaurd against letting my disappointment over not getting engaged for Christmas overshadow the meaning of the holiday. Besides, my SO is such a generous and thoughtful gift giver…I want to enjoy and appreciate the things he does for me for Christmas without letting engagement wistfulness diminish them.
Last night, we were on a very romantic bike ride through a neighborhood that gets really festive for Xmas. We had our bikes all decked out, and were playing nice acoustic Chrismtas music from our little boom box. We were enjoying the moment when the words just kinda came out of me: “_______ was asking me if I thought you were going to propose this Christmas or New Years.” I think my face said it all.
He very honestly and kindly told me that he was sorry, but there won’t be engagement on the horizon any time soon. I completely agree with his reasoning; as much as we both want to be engaged, becoming financial stable is priority number one. I just graduated with my teaching credential, and he is on his last semester of his Firefighting program.
He went on to say he felt so badly for the ups and downs I go through waiting year after year. He even cried a couple of tears…it was very sincere.
I thanked him for the talk and “letting me off the hook” so I can enjoy the holidays without the hope of a proposal messing things up. It really is nice just to enjoy our relationship the way it is and not take things for granted.