(Closed) He says I never care…is it me or is he just being difficult?

posted 8 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
3176 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Wow. First of all if FH told me that his breakfast was an hour late I’d have a HUGE problem with that. You freaking cook his breakfast and he complains that its late?? Umm….thats not ok. Also he’s not feeling well but that doesn’t give him the right to blame you. If he is healthy enough to sit at a table and eat breakfast he is healthy enough to pick up the phone and call the doctor himself, as an adult that is his responsibility. It doesn’t sound very healthy for him to be putting you down like that.

Post # 4
Member
420 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I, personally, just think he is being a baby, cause he is sick. Men seem to Milk the sickness thing. He probably expects you to dote on him left and right. I wouldn’t take it to heart. He is likely annoyed with being sick, probably a little bit bored, and your face is the first thing he sees. Unfortunately, he takes his frustration out on poor you. Try to nurture him the best you can, but that is all you can do. Don’t let him and his cold, bully you into feeling like an ogar! He’s being a big baby!!

Post # 5
Member
466 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Most men are complete helpless babies when they get sick.  This seems over the top, though.  You did call the doctor for him – and it sounds like you do it all the time?  Plus, you always make his breakfast?  It doesn’t sound like you’re happy with your role in this relationship and I think that is the main issue that needs to be addressed.

Post # 7
Member
2398 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

Uh, apparently he has confused “caring” with “being his mommy.”  You can nurture a person and expect that he’ll be an adult who makes his own decisions.

Post # 9
Member
8354 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2011

I am sorry you had such a rough morning. When guys are sick, they are worse than small children. They need and expect to be babied to the max. If they don’t get babied, they have little temper tantrums and/or sulk. I know this from experience. They don’t want to make any decisions when they are sick and they want you to treat them like you are their mom. My FI was sick a couple of weeks ago and the way he was acting, you would think he was on his death bed. Finally, I just had to be firm with him and tell him to go to bed. Every now and then, I would check on him, just like I would with a child, to make sure he was okay. I made sure he had water and saltines by the bed and made sure to tell him to drink lots of water but just to take baby sips, so his stomack didn’t get upset. I also told him that he needed to keep something in his stomach, so it would get better, and I told him just to take baby bites of the crackers, suck on them until they were soft and then chew them up and swallow them. I also made sure that he took some ibuprofen for his aches. I am sorry, but 99% of the guys out there are this way. I also have to say though, when you are sick, don’t expect the same treatment back because most guys don’t even notice if you aren’t feeling well. You have to tell them, and then you have to tell them exactly how you want to be looked after. You have to be very specific.

Post # 11
Member
1079 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

Let’s see…you made his breakfast, you called the doctor, and now he wants you to decide whether he should go to his exam? I think he needs to grow up a little. I think you need to tell him a few times “honey, you need to make your own decision about that.” See if he gets in the habit of being more independent. Not all guys need to be babied – FI goes to work no matter what, except the time he was too sick to get out of bed and had to ask a friend to drop off some coke to help his stomach (he lived 2000 miles away at the time – I would have taken care of him if he was closer).

Post # 14
Member
1288 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2010 - Indiana Memorial Union

Sounds like a big Baby Huey 🙂 Some guys are just helplessly wimpy when sick.

Post # 15
Member
420 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

@Ms Scarlet: I’m glad you feel a little better. Smile 

It’s all men…. even as I am typing this my FI is itching a mosquito bite and whining about why I am not getting the “special cream I have” for it and putting it on. It is not a magic cream for God’s sake, and he darn well knows where it is and how to put it on!

The funny part is that I actually went and got it for his lazy, baby butt, cause he wouldn’t shut up, and his huge effort was sticking his foot out for me to put it on!!!

 

I didn’t btw.

And, he is complaining that I am hogging the laptop and on that “wedding site” again…

Post # 16
Member
165 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: February 2010

ditto to everyone who said men tend to be huge babies when they are sick!

A few years ago at work, my co-worker’s husband had the flu, and he would call her every half an hour to complain and whine. She finally went home around noon because it would seem he couldn’t bear to heat up and pour a bowl of soup for lunch in his death-like state and she stayed there for the rest of the day to avoid 8 more calls that day.

I should also mention my co-worker and her husband are both well into their 40s.

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