He says I'm not being respectful of our money….

posted 3 years ago in Money
Post # 3
3756 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

@MrsSweetT:  They just don’t get it sometimes. My FI is trying to pick at my budget too. He just doesn’t understand that I’ve already got it down to the minimum and am spending hardly anything on these things. He legit wants me to not even do centerpieces… I think your spending sounds perfectly reasonable. A $35 veil?! Awesome!

Post # 4
3570 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

classic man.  totally clueless!

Post # 5
1244 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

Do you have a budget, and are you wirhin the budget?

Post # 6
737 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@MrsSweetT:  Sounds reasonable to me!  I would show him some other options that are much more pricey and make him appreciate your thriftiness!

Post # 7
9526 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

Since you aren’t looking for advice, I won’t give any. Sorry you’re frustrated.

Post # 8
1057 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

Don’t worry, men will never understand how important a wedding is to a woman. 

My FI are pretty sweet most of the time, let me do whatever I want but sometimes, he still made stupid comments like I care about how a table # look (I spend $4 on amazon.com) and tell others I have “standard”…….. ai, men 

Post # 9
2792 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

@MrsSweetT: “Respectful of money?”  Really, thats the words he used?  I don’t think you can really be “respectful of money.” 

I would show him the bridal salon’s cost of veils.  Those usually run $100 +

Post # 10
9137 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

@MrsSweetT:  Have you already agreed on a budget?  If so, point out where in the budget the money for accessories is coming from.  If you don’t have at least a basic budget then you need to sit down and write one out.  My accessories fell under the bridal attire budget and so long as I didn’t go over that amount, he couldn’t complain about anything I was buying to wear for the wedding, be it the dress, the shoes, the flower for my hair, etc…

Post # 11
1988 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

@MrsSweetT:  Men! When they spend hundreds on silly gaming/computer equipment that’s all fine and dandy but $35 for a veil is a “disrespectful attitude towards money”? I sometimes wonder how we manage to coexist with them Laughing

Post # 12
208 posts
Helper bee

I think you are doing an AMAZING job. A $35 veil?? OMGGG. When my fiance says stuff like this… I show him comparable prices from standard lowe-price vendors so he gets the idea.

FOR EXAMPLE. With your veil… you can be like “Here LOOK at these David’s Bridal priced veils.” (Not hating on Davids Bridal at all but they are notoriously at the less expensive end of the bridal spectrum). But even at davids bridal they are $100 +. Just educate him.

Post # 13
4638 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

My veil was over $400, that’s disrespectful of money.. if that’s even a thing.

Show him what these things are supposed to cost, and then he’ll see how much you’re actually saving!

Post # 14
1178 posts
Bumble bee

Of course they never say anything if it’s for their car accessories, video game accessories etc! This is for a wedding…the only one in your life and your costs are prudent IMHO.

Post # 15
11772 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2013

Men! I’d bring him over to the boards next time someone is waffling between a $600 veil and an $800 veil. Or trying to decide between $200 pairs of shoes. Just to be like “Look, I am a wonderful mistress of frugality. Love it.”

Post # 16
525 posts
Busy bee

Is he willing to let you spend on lingerie? Not being purposely provacative. Oddly, my FI and I are both cheap and he saw a Bee post on the subject and told me I had free reign (however he knows me well enough to know that I will cap that too). My FI though  is the “spoil yourself” type when it comes to making me happy…

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