Post # 1
I have tried on so many rings, just trying to find what style I like. In the end, I fell in love with a gorgeous White Gold, Brilliant Round Cut, 6 prong, Solitaire setting ring. Although I told myself that I didn’t care about the size of the diamond (it’s not a competition to see who’s partner earns more blah blah..) It was more about finding one we could afford, but in the end it came down to what looked good on my finger.
I have fairly slender hands, reasonably long fingers, and according to the jeweller – no knuckles.
So when I tried on a 0.75 carat, it looked ridiculous. On my hand it just looked like a joke.
It looked so much bigger that it just looked like it was fake.
After many, many rings, I decided that anything between 0.30 and 0.60 looked stunning.
So when I tried to tell my partner my preferences, it turned into an argument about me not believing in him to be able to pick a ring by himself that I would like. He won’t even acknowledge what I like, because as far as he’s concerned – I’ll like it no matter what he picks because it’s about what it represents, not what it looks like.
Am I in the wrong here?
I mean, I’m the one who will be wearing it… Shouldn’t I like it?
What if he picks something I really, REALLY don’t like?
🙁 I know that sounds so materialistic but, c’mon. I like what I like!
Post # 3
I think if you give him the specs and general preferences, he still has a LOT of room for customization while being mindful of what you want. I’m a firm believer that just because the guy you love picks a ring, it does NOT mean he has a single clue about diamonds. To me it’s like if I bought a guy a car but the only thing I knew about it was that it was shiny. What, you don’t like it? It doesn’t work? Oh, well it’s shiny and I picked it, so you have to use it. LOVE YOU! no. You’ll probably like what he picks, probably. He might surprise you with something you totally never expected to like either. But the problem is that he thinks he knows better than you, that he won’t consider your feelings. Why doesn’t he love that you took the pressure off him by doing all of the research, and that you have a preference for smaller diamonds? He has the entire rest of your marriage to buy you right hand rings of his choice, or maybe he can pick or help pick your wedding band after you have your engagement ring, but I think it’s gonna be a way harder hit to his ego if he picks a ring you hate than to just take a couple hints beforehand. Maybe you two could go ring shopping together, and then he just holds onto the ring until it’s time.
Post # 4
Whoops! Looks like this is a double post. I’m going to close this thread and send everyone here to comment:
He Wants To Pick The Ring