Post # 1
Finding it impossible to figure out my Head Table. The following people will be at the head table:
Myself of course and my new husband (me sitting to his right will never work though-he is right handed, I am left handed) so, I will have to be to the Left of him so we can both comfortably eat?
The other people involved are the following:
My Mom and Dad
My Sister ( sort of the Maid of Honor)
My Granddaugther (Flower Girl)
My Son-Escorting me down the Isle
The Best Man- Fiance brother
Also to be included at the head table:
Best Man’s wife
My Son-s wife and little baby Granddaugther (10 months old)
Ok, so does anyone have a suggestion as to how I can properly seat everyone?
This is my idea:
The Officiant (Lady) on the left side of table-very end.
OK, now I am stuck. HELP!!!
PS. I love this site. You guys are great with all your help and suggestions.
Post # 3
Hmmm, ever think of doing a sweet heart table for just you two, and letting everyone else sit together family style? It gets strange with little ones at the head table and I am just saying you do not want to be within 10 feet of a 10 month old when they are eating, when you are in your wedding dress.
Post # 4
why is your officiant sitting with you??? and the best mans wife??? its usually just the bridal party. I would agree to just do a sweetheart table for just you two!!
Post # 5
I do think that the significant other should sit with their dates… but as PP said, why the officiant? Do you have a problem with space or just order?
Post # 6
usually the head table just holds the bridal party and bride and groom – it doesnt usually need to include your parents or officiant
Post # 7
Well, thius is the “etiquette” board, so I’ll tell you what “etiquette” actually says. Then feel free to do something different.
Etiquette says, that you never seat married couples side by side at a formal meal; with the exception of the host and hostess (and then, only when you are doing high-table seating, european style, which is what a “head table” is). Nor should you seat any close kin side-by-side (for example, siblings, or parent and child)
So, the host and hostess sit side by side in the centre of the table.
Etiquette also says, that the most honoured guests sit closest to the host and hostess. The way you fingure out who is most honoured is: guests-of-honour before other guests, unrelated people are honoured before your relatives; public servants before people who are in private employ; elderly before youth; teachers before students.
Etiquette also says, that you generally alternate male-female around the table. This just recognizes the reality that conversation tends to have more sparkle and less tendency to get into “shop talk”. Finally, etiquette recommends that you seat bores next to people who are hard of hearing, and otherwise take into account matters of personal compatibility, even when so doint requires overriding one of the other considerations of precedence.
So following that rule you have something like:
Sister (Maid of Honour)
Your table is a bit female-heavy, and I’ve used the “compatibility” rule to seat children next to parents who can cut their meat for them or whisper table-manner reminders in their ears; and also to seat great-grandchildren near doting grandparents.
Post # 8
Does your sister not have a date or SO? If she did it could help even it out a bit. I’m not a fan of long, one way facing head tables. Plus, the kids might get really uncomfortable with everyone looking at them all night. I would recommend doing a sweetheart table and then the family together at another one or two tables on either side. Also, you really don’t want a baby around eating anywhere near you in your gown! :O
Post # 9
Well, first of all, the wedding officiant turns out to be an old friend of my Fiance so not only is she going to marry us, but she is invited to the wedding as a guest.
The other thing is, my Dad has suddenly insisted that he and my Mom be at the head Table because as he put it (we have to represent the family). Like who, I can’t figure that one out but not going to bother to ask him.
So, I was going to have my Parents at Table No. 1 with my aunt, his sister and then I read online you can seat the officiant at the same table as the Parents.
In conclusion, I just threw up my hands and said “the hell with it”, I’ll have the wedding party, respective spouses etc. at the head table so they are not left out or made to sit with people they do not know.
My daugther in-law I think I will sit on an end seat, away from me with the baby.
So, there goes my thought of the Sweetheart table which was something I thought I might do before the complication of where my Parents expect to sit. Got to love them, plus they are helping somewhat financially and have already given us quite a nice check as a wedding gift.
Post # 10
I agree with you. Read further down my answer. Oh, the Officiant? turns out she is an old friend from my Fiance younger days so she is also invited as a guest.
Post # 11
That is great what you have here. I love it!!!
One slight thing here though, where at the headtable do I seat the wife of the best man (FI’s brother) and FI’s sister in-law?
The Wedding Party are all Family Members.
Post # 12
The Great-Grandchildren are the Flower Girl and Baby Abby and my Parents are the Great-Grandparents. The girls are my Son’s children, my Grandchildren.
I basically like your set up. Just have to see where to sit the sister-in-law, the Best Man’s wife.
It is somewhat tough because yes, it is kind of female-heavy.
Post # 13
I agree when it comes to the baby so she will be sitting at the end of the table far away from me.
My other Granddaugther will not have any problem with people looking at her as she has already had the experience of being on a stage in a beauty pagent and has had experience posing for portfolio photos for modeling and she is just 4 1/2. No, has never gotten a modeling job but did win the beauty pagent for Most Photogenic. so, no problem there.
The problem started when my Dad insisted on having him and my Mom at the Head Table even though he decided they are coming just as guests and, my Dad did not want to walk me down the isle so there is the monkey wrench for the Sweetheart Table idea.
Post # 14
I agree, but as I have tried to answer all who have replied to my post. My Dad has now insisted on he and my Mom sitting at the Head Table, so I was just handed a Monkey Wrench, so it would be insulting to leave someone or someone’s spouse out.
The Officiant is also an old friend of FI’s.
Post # 15
Just the order and the officiant is an old friend of my Fiance and the complication came about when my Dad suddenly announced he and my Mom are expecting to sit at the Head Table.
I was originally going to have the Sweatheart Table.
Post # 16
Lol – oh forget it then! The little granddaughter will probably LOVE being at the headtable, :)! How cute!
Sounds like it will be really nice (with the baby on the end :P) with lots of love up there.