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Things have been pretty intense these past few weeks and I really can't stress enough how much your guys' support has meant to both of us. Whether it was on the boards or through a PM, every word has helped. And it looks like this roller coaster is coming to an end. HGC levels have continued to drop pretty dramatically and at this point it is beyond the point of recovery. The heartbeats have stopped and a D&C is scheduled for next week. The only explanation we have as for why all this happened the way it did is that I had gotten my shot either right before or right after we got pregnant and the hormones messed everything up. The worst part is... I don't feel sad. I am angry that I don't feel sad. I guess I just didn't have time to bond with or really come to terms with the fact that I was pregnant. It all literally happened in the matter of 2 weeks that I found out, we realized there was a problem, and now we are seeing the end results of the problem. My Dr. think I only noticed something was off because something WAS off. But with the babies and not me. How I didn't know I was even pregnant in the first place I will never know... I don't really know what else to do or what else to say. I should feel sad. And maybe it wont hit me until later. Right now this whole thing has just left me... numb. I am trying to stay positive and I know that this is just one of the terribly unfortunate things that will happen in our life to make us stronger. So, thank you guys for your support. I know we will get through this.
As long as you have each other and are each others strenght you can get through everything. I wish I had something better to tell you but all I can give you are my best wishes and all my support. A huge hug to you.
I'm so sorry to hear this, Ms. Hedgehog. *HUGS*
And don't be upset about your feelings. We can't help how we feel and react to the events in our lives sometimes and there is nothing wrong with that. Plus, I'm sure you'll have changing and shifting emotions about this whole thing as it continues to play out and when you look back on it later.
Lean on Mr. Hedgehog (and your family and friends) in this difficult time. I'll be thinking of you both!
I'm sorry for the loss of your pregnancy. Having a D&C is another thing you will have to cope with.
Give yourself permission to grieve your losses.
@Ms Hedgehog: I am so sorry to hear that. You definitely shouldn't be angry that you aren't sad, everyone copes differently. I don't even know anything helpful to say but I will be praying for you and your husband!
I'm really sorry you had to go through all this; I've been thinking about you often.
Take the time to feel however you feel. If you're angry, that's valid. If you do become sad later, that's valid, too. Numbness right now is valid. I hope you can just focus on you and DH and feeling better.
*huge internet stranger hugs* :)
I am just soooo sorry. Don't be so hard on yourself right now, just take everything day by day, you're going through a lot.
I am SO sorry that you're going through this, no one should have to. It will definitely make your relationship stronger though. Hugs!!
This breaks my heart. I am so sorry and I will be praying for your D&C. I am sorry hun and I am glad that you have the support of your DH.
One of my recently pregnant friends and I had an interesting discussion. In a nutshell, she didn't feel terribly attached to her baby for the first 4 or 5 months of her pregnancy. She realized it was completely and totally a self-protective strategy, but knowing that so many pregnancies don't result in a child being born basically meant that she did not allow herself to get attached until a certain point.
You are supposed to feel however you are feeling. Don't get angry at yourself for not feeling the "correct" emotion.
Awww I am sooo sorry you are going through this! Sending you bugs hugs to you and hubby! Stay strong and you will get through this.
I'm so sorry for you and your family. I would like to say what you're feeling is normal. Please don't be mad at yourself - right now you're in survival mode - you have to do what you have to do. Later, if you feel the need to, take time for yourself or both you and your husband to grieve. I've been praying for you.
I'm so sorry, you feel whatever you are feeling. There's no right or wrong.
And you're absolutely right, this is just another hardship in the long life you and your husband will have together. It will only make you two stronger.
HUGS.
I'm so sorry :( As cliche as it sounds, everything really does happen for a reason - even if we don't know what that reason is now. I wish you and your husband the best and hope that in the future you will have much less hardships.
I am so sad for you guys.There is nothing wrong with how you're feeling. Even if you get to a point of not feeling, it's okay. Sending lots of hugs and prayers your way.
So sorry to hear this sweetie. There is no right or wrong way to feel in a situation like this... you do what YOU have to do to feel better. Sending you lots of ((((HUGS)))).
I'm sorry that you feel guilty for not feeling sad. However, you don't have to feel any particular way about it. You've been through so much for someone that wasn't planning on having babies right now. Keep yourself sane, that's what is most important right now.
There is no right or wrong way to feel. You had a huge shock, followed by another, followed by another, and your hormones could be out of whack as well, affecting all of this. Please be patient with yourself; you seem to be handling things WAY better than I would. Prayers and hugs!
I am really sorry. :( Don't feel guilty though. Whatever you feel is what you feel & you cannot change that. Just take it one step at a time. In the end it will make you & Mr. Hedgie much stronger! I hope your D&C goes okay.
(((HUGS)))
I'm so incredibly sorry for you and your husband. You have been through so much in the past few weeks that I'm sure this is all so difficult to process. Please don't feel bad that you aren't sad - you weren't expecting to be pregnant and then you barely knew and then found out that something may be wrong. You've barely had time to even process that fact that you were pregnant. It very well may have had nothing to do with your shot - twins are (obviously) extra stress on your body and it's not unusual to lose one or both in early pregnancy. Whatever you feel, please don't blame yourself - this has been a situation very much out of your control.
Thoughts and prayers to you and your husband.
I am SO sorry...I wish I could say something to make it better. HUGS!!
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