Post # 1
- Wedding: August 2007 - The Wellington House in Fayetteville, NY
I didn’t even realize there was a seperate board for this now. How cool!
Let’s introduce ourselves 🙂
I’m Mrs. Radish. I live in Chicago and had my wedding in Syracuse, NY at St. Matthew’s church. Mr. Radish is Catholic (I’m not) so had a Catholic wedding, but we didn’t have a full mass.
I know planning a Catholic wedding can be a little confusing (especially to brides like me who aren’t actually Catholic) so this board should be really helpful in answering everyone’s questions.
Also, I think a lot of people have misconceptions about the chuch – I certainly did – so maybe this can be a good place for people to learn more about Catholicism in general, too.
Post # 3
Hello, I’m Mrs. Bird of Paradise and I’m also here to help. I’m Catholic and Mr. Bop is not. We had a Catholic wedding in our town’s Cathedral. We also choose not to have a full mass. Each church seems to have different ways of doing things, and I can share my experiences if needed. I’ll try my best to answer any questions as well!
Post # 4
- Wedding: June 2008 - St. Catherine of Genoa, Jin Asian Cuisine Restaurant
Hi ladies! Miss Toucan here! I’m also a non-Catholic having a Catholic ceremony (just a few more weeks!). Since I’m not Catholic (and Mr. Toucan is), we also chose not to do the full mass.
The funny thing is… I actually know more about Catholicism than Mr. T! It doesn’t really mean much, because I don’t know that much, but I went to Catholic high school so I’m not totally in the dark either. 🙂
Post # 5
- Wedding: November 2007 - Radisson Hotel
I’m also a non-Catholic who had a Catholic wedding! I think it may have been easier for me, since it was Mr. Kiwi’s workplace that actually was our church! We also didn’t have a Catholic mass.
It can be overwhelming, I know Mrs. BOP and Radish were a help for me, and hopefully I can help if anyone needs something. 🙂
Post # 6
Hi guys! I’m the opposite of all of the above posters – I"m Catholic and FI is not and we’re NOT having a Catholic wedding. Turns out that because FI was married before (not to a Catholic, not even in a Catholic ceremony) he needs an annulment. That’s not an option we’re going to pursue and that has forced me to give up my dream of getting married in the same church I grew up in, my parents and grandparents got married in, family and friends have gotten married in, etc.
We decided not to go the annulment route because neither of us believe in it. An annulment basically states that his previous marriage did not happen. Well, it did. And he’s who I love because of it. And I also didn’t really like the idea of him contacting his ex-wife (who is remarried with kids) to ask permission (essentially) for him to marry me. According to the priest at the church I went to, she would have had to come and be interviewed, FI would have had to come be interviewed as well as three friends from each side who knew them during their dating, marriage and divorce periods. Soooo, no thanks.
So we’re getting married in a great Lutheran church in my hometown instead (we don’t live there) but during the process of finding someone who would do our required pre-marital counseling (the Catholic church I go to here refused) we found a great Lutheran church which both of us love and are probabaly going to start attending together. Not that that has anything to do with the Catholic board, I was just hoping to give people a heads up as to what to expect (sort of) with the decision for an annulment or not. And they said it would take more than a year.
Post # 7
Both my FI and I grew up in fairly strict Catholic houses – Catholic gradeschool and church every Sunday. I grew apart from the church durring high school and college (so did my FI), but we are still having a full Catholic ceremony. We are getting married in the church that my parents belong to. We will be having two priests b/c the one currently at the church was caught in a "situation" (it didn’t envolve kids), but besides that his homilies (the part after the Gospel) are completely unbearable! So we’ve asked the old priest to come back who is still friends with my parents. To make things more interesting, we’ll be doing our pre-marital counseling in CA and the wedding is in MN. We found a church that we both like here and are going to become memebers and start the process. So hopefully with in the next month we’ll start the process, so I’ll be able to give advice as I go along.
Post # 8
Hello! I’m a Catholic bride with a non-Catholic fiance. We are having a Catholic ceremony in NH without a full mass. The priest is an old friend of my aunt, so it works out nicely.
We’re done with pre-Cana, FOCCUS test complete, and we’re starting to plan the ceremony, so this forum came right in time!
Post # 9
- Wedding: September 2008 - Catholic Church and Reception at The W Hotel
Hello everyone! This is Miss Hydrangea – I’m actually having a full blown Catholic Mass with all the Hispanic traditions as well, talk about a long ceremony! Mr. H has always been Catholic and last year I became Catholic. Since I’m still very new to the church, I think I have a lot to learn like those who are not Catholic.
Post # 10
My fiance had a catholic annulment, and his wife was definatly not interviewed. She was sent a list of questions, and we were assured that if she did not answer the questions that it would not hold up the process. Other than that, there was absolutly no communication with her at all. He did need 2 people that knew him and his ex during the dating,marriage and divorce, and they also got a list of questions. (I pretty much filled it out for them) They were never interviewed.
His annulment took 9 months and cost a total of $600.
This would be the Scranton diocese in PA.
We will be married this weekend (May 24th 2008) with a full Catholic mass. And I love our priest because he works fast, so our mass should be about 45 minutes.
Post # 11
Hi everybody! Me and the fiance are both Catholic converts (me this past Easter and him at Easter of 2006) from the Episcopalian church. We’re having a full Catholic mass (in November), but beyond that we haven’t planned any specifics (readings, music, etc). I’m excited to hear about what details you all will be using or have used in your ceremonies!
Also, I hope to be a good resource on Catholicism in general. My fiance is a theology nut, and I did a number on his Catholic literature before joining the church, so I know a lot about it!
Post # 12
Two other points of clarification on annulments for those who might be in that situation too:
1. The divorced parties do not have to contact or be in contact with one another for the proceedings to take place, as Candi1024 said—especially important if one of the people was abusive that you don’t have to go back to that.
2. An annulment does not mean that the relationship never existed or had no meaning, it means that it never existed on a sacramental level. Similarly, any children born of a later-annulled marriage are not made illegitimate by it. Hope this helps!
Post # 13
Hi! Like Miss Hydrangea and chelseamorning, I just converted to Catholicism! I was officially confirmed on Easter. My fiance is very Italian Catholic, so it was important to me to learn about and become engaged in that part of his life. I grew up Southern Baptist, though, so my family will be a little out in left field for our full Catholic mass ceremony (which is why I plan on doing detailed programs to make sure everyone knows what’s going on… including me). 🙂 I still have a lot to learn, and I’m so excited to hear everyone’s advice and choices on readings, etc!
Post # 14
- Wedding: January 2018 - catherdral ceremony/private club reception
Hey hey! Mr. Mags and I are both Catholic – I’m a "cradle Catholic" and he converted in college. We were married at the Cathedral of Christ the King in Atlanta.
I’ll be interested to see the discussions that take place here, specifically around the different types of pre-cana that the bees took part in. We decided on a Sponsor Couple program, and I’m so glad we did!
Post # 15
You "decided" on a sponsor couple program? We didn’t have a choice! We went to a pre-cana class with about 30 other people. We actually had a good time and enjoyed it. FI is always making jokes in groups like that and he always makes me laugh. The main thing we liked about it was that it lasted all day and then we were done. We took our "FOCUS" test survey at that class.
BTW, when he listened to the church’s views on marriage and sex and having children, it actually helped to him to decide that he wanted another child. (we already have one together) and I am super excited!
Also, didn’t give this part of our background, I am a cradle catholic including a catholic high school and he converted easter vigil 2005.
Post # 16
LNickle – here’s a link to info on our programs including readings and songs we chose