Weddingbee boards

We're having a non-religious ceremony, however we want to incorporate a tradition from both families (my family is Jewish, his is Catholic).  For my side, we are breaking the glass.  The officiant will say something about what it symbolizes, and possiby not refer to religion at all.  We are looking for something comparable on the Catholic side. A symbol would be great, rather than a prayer.  Or if it is a prayer or reading, perhaps one that does not refer to specific aspects of the religion. Any suggestions???

Thanks for the suggestion! The only problem with a unity candle is that the ceremony is outdoors. Our officiant advised us against lighting a candle (which could be hazardous or blow out). She said in its place, people sometimes do a sand ceremony, however I'm not sure whether this counts as a catholic tradition?

I just googled hand tying ceremony, and I found "hand fasting" ceremony. Is this the same? Anyway, it says its a celtic tradition.

Thanks to all of you! I definately like the idea of the "sign of the peace". I think that's sweet and would be a unique addition to the ceremony. I also like the idea of a reading - as long as it's "subtle" in its religious overtones. We're trying to be sensitive to both sides. Thanks girls!

Just as my personal opinion, I find it rather awkward to try to have some sort of "Catholic" tradition in a non-Catholic setting. I understand wanting to celebrate both partners backgrounds but really, Catholicism isn't the same as Judaism in this respect.

There are many people that identify themselves as 'culturally' Jewish but you can't call yourself 'culturally' Catholic, it doesn't exist. It boils down to either being Catholic or not. Being a non-praciticing Catholic doesn't make one 'culturally' Catholic, it makes one a lapsed Catholic, but still Catholic. You can't just stop being Catholic by stopping your practice nor can you just call yourself Catholic if you have never received the sacraments.

Again, I appreciate wanting to give respect and pay tribute to the religious backgrounds, but it rubs me the wrong way to pick and choose and dilute symbols and practices of the Catholic faith. It feels disrespectful and innapropriate to do something just for the sake of doing it rather than truly believing in it.  And yes, I do find having a sign of peace to fall under the umbrella of being innappropriate in this conext. To quote mibee's quote

"...acceptance of all that has been accomplished in the celebration and of the commitment to mutual love which is made in sharing the one bread..."

if you aren't actually celebrating the sacrafice of the Mass and the consecration of the host then this is technically not applicable. I think the idea of doing something like the sign of peace at a wedding is a truly lovely idea, but to do it under the pretense of 'doing it because it is Catholic and we want something Catholic' just seems to be inappropriate.

Again, this is just my opinion. I fully respect you and your right to plan your wedding as you desire. I am positive that you and your guests will be part of a beautiful and meaningful ceremony no matter which path you decide to take. :)

@Penguingal06: I get where you're coming from, but of all of the symbolism that she could use, I think a sign of peace is the least problematic from the perspective you mentioned. 

If you look at the Rite of Peace in the GIRM (#82): "The Rite of Peace follows, by which the Church asks for peace and unity for herself and for the whole human family, and the faithful express to each other their ecclesial communion and mutual charity before communicating in the Sacrament." 

So you can see that it's an ecclesiastical act of prayer for the entire human race.  Given that, it seems appropriate.

@CoffeeHound: I agree, it is the least inappropriate. Well that or carrying a rosary with her bouquet. I just can't seem to think of any logical reason why simply carrying the rosary would be inappropriate. Still, no matter what she does I am sure she will have a lovely and meaningful ceremony.

Thanks for the perspective! I can certainly understand where you're coming from, and the differences between cultural and religious practices. There are certainly many members of my family who aren't religious, but still consider themselves Jewish culturally.  I will mention this to my FI to get his take...this is really for him, as he felt we couldn't "do something Jewish" withouth "doing something Catholic".  I wouldn't want to offend anyone in that way either.

@Ngolden1: As I mentioned in another thread, a Catholic/Jewish wedding performed with permission from the Catholic Church (which is necessary for the Catholic Church to recognize the marriage) is entirely Jewish.  The rabbi performs the entire ceremony and a priest witnesses it and can give a blessing at the end if asked. 

So I don't think you have to do "something Catholic, something Jewish" necessarily.  But if you want to, I'm sure it would be appreciated.  The sign of peace seems like a nice addition that most people would recognize.  

what about having a statue of Mary at the site and have someone sing Ave Maria while you go over and place a flower before the statue.  that's a Catholic tradition.  It's not required by any means but most couples (in the city i live in) are asked if they want to do this tradition.