Post # 1
Well, it’s been 5 months since I got married. I got married fairly young, but dated my wonderful Hubby for 4 years before tying the knot. So basically, my bridesmaids are still in their “let’s get super drunk and never settle down” kind of phase, which I completely understand seeing as we are all in college or college age. Although I’m the same age, I finished school early (lots of hard work!) and have a career already. Basically, what I’m saying is I’m far beyond the days of staying up late/drinking/making out with random guys. Sorry this is so long and whatnot. Anyways, my friends (who were also my bridesmaids) have been my closest friends since we were in elementary school. And since I met my husband, they have treated me kind of terribly. They don’t text me or call me even when I make an effort to ask about their lives. They are never interested in what is going on in my life. They call only when they need something (aka, my house for a get together because they all live with their parents, rent free I might add). They plan coffee dates to update on life and ‘forget’ to invite me or ignore my presense alltogether. It doesn’t help that we have a group for the 5 of us on facebook so it’s easier to communicate/share our lives so I see absolutely everything going on it their life but they say things like “remember what I told you guys (except me) last week? Well so and so said this and now this is happening.” etc. There are a lot of other things, but I don’t want to bore you all with the details 🙂 Any advice bees?
Post # 3
I don’t think they treat you terribly based on what you told us. Like you said, you girls are just in a different phase of life. My MOH/best friend hardly call me out and I can also see she always hang out with others on fb too. We don’t see ach other very often, won’t hang out more than 10 times during the years and been like that for few years but when we do catch up, we chat for hours…. (what am I gonna say with her mommy friends?)
Reason behind it? Because we are at different phase of life but same age. She got married and have two kids. She used to be a party goer but married at 25. At the mean time, I’m busy building my career and been in and out of different relationship. Reason she/me dun call her out as often, 1) our schedule won’t fit that well 2) we respect each other in different life style.
Imagine if they call you out for party, their steamy single lives may make you feel left out. I think that maybe the reason behind all these. As for ignoring your text, I think they may just dunno what to say to you. While you tell them your married life what are they supposed to tell you back?
Post # 4
I think you’re just at different phases in your lives, but as your closest friends they should reach out to include you in their activities. My best friend got married, and I don’t really treat her any differently. I get that she now has a husband, but it’s not like she lives on another planet and I can’t get to her. Out of our friend group, we are the only couple that’s engaged and our single friends are more than willing to make themselves at home! Haha. They are ALWAYS over, very supportive of wedding plans, etc. I think there is a very faint line where they do kind of give us our space (and I do this for the married couple, too) but it shouldn’t be so obvious or painful like what you’re going through. I would simply be blunt and type in that Facebook message “So, are we all going to meet up sometime so that you can include me or what?” If they are your closest friends, then there shouldn’t be any weirdness there.