Post # 1
I’m going to start off by saying I haven’t had good luck with bridesmaids (other than my sisters) at all. I had asked a friend from high school to be in my wedding, and 6 months after saying yes she decided she didn’t want to be in my wedding, let alone be involved in my life anymore. That drama happened months ago, and though I’m still hurt from it I’ve started to move on. I replaced her with a friend from work.
Today, a bridesmaid told me she lost her job a few weeks ago. We still have time until the wedding, however the bridesmaids dresses are set to be ordered by monday to get them in time and give the girls enough time to get their dresses altered. I was already covering half of this bridesmaids dress and she was going to pay me back. I have a hard time covering her entire dress though, espeically since theres no say in when she will get another job.
I don’t want to be insensitive towards my bridesmaid, but my mom told me I need to talk to her about if she still wants to be in the wedding and to tell her I completely understand it’s hard to know where she’ll be at in a few months. Is it right to ask her this or should I just let it play out? I dont know how to handle this situation, especially since I dont want to pay for her dress only to find out she still hasn’t found a job 3 months later and can’t pay me back.
Post # 3
I would approach her and let her know that if being in your wedding is too much for her financially given that she is unemployed, you completely understand if she needs to drop out of the wedding.
I think she might appreciate being offered an easy exit. If she says no, that she’s got it covered, then so be it. You can remind her of the deadline to order the dress, then leave it be.
Post # 4
@julies1949: +1, totally agree. it would be better to be open and have a chat with her, and see how she feels.
Post # 5
I fully agree that you need to talk to her. Let’s just say you let it play out and she still hasn’t found a job, then what? If you enter lightly into the conversation I am sure she will understand especially if you help her see things from your side as well. Hope all goes well!
Post # 6
@Sunshine1011: You need to have a calm and mature conversation. Ask her if she’s still up for it, and if she is then you need to be understanding where her budget is concerned. She just lost her job, so she probably won’t be able to afford a pricey dress, so you need to be willing to compromise, either l;oan her the money for the dress you want her in, if it’s out of her budget, or be willing to allow her to wear something in her budget.
Post # 7
Is there a way you can find a cheaper, similar bridesmaid dress? She probably fells awful that she may not be able to afford the dress. I’m sure you’ll figure out a way to help your dear friend stay in the wedding,