- 3 years ago
- Wedding: October 2013
My 1st post ever…need some outside HELP / what to do!!! I’m the bride to be 🙂 :
I need some major help! Wedding is less than a week away and I have my mother-in-law AND now sister-in-law threatening not to come to the wedding (ie they won’t be in any part of it and his sister won’t be in the wedding party). On his side: his mother divorced his father – did not end well.
To describe my FMIL: she is manipulative, verbally abusive and just crazy. There are times when she is nice and pleasent to be around, but then will fly off the handle out of no where. She is just cruel to my fiance (luckily he can stand up for himself) – won’t go into every story, but here is why they are telling us they won’t come to the wedding on Oct 12. Wish I could make this stuff up and didn’t think this would ever happen to me:
My fiance (27 yrs old) has 2 other siblings: Brother (25 yrs old) and Sister (23 yrs old). In the divorce the sister (FSIL) stayed with the mom (FMIL) and pretty much takes the mom’s side on EVERYTHING single thing.
1. At the wedding receiption my fiance and I want to have the brother/best man sit with their father. We arranged this in the seating chart with my mom. Multiple reasons: so the siblings can mingle with all families because crazy FMIL will trap them at her table all night, the parents are divorced and EVERYONE but her thought this was fair, brother/bestman will be at the rehearsal dinner and can sit with her and see her there. Plus, brother/bestman can move around during dinner to sit with his mom (if he even wants to at this point).
2. My mom gets a call from crazy FMIL and gets them to switch so the siblings are at the SAME table with her. This upsets myself and my fiance. We tell my mom no and that the brother/best man must sit with the father.
3. My fiance calls his mom to tell her this and explain the reasons so that brother/best man can mingle and move around. PLUS the sister doesn’t want to sit with the father so it can’t be a switching of the siblings. Well…doesn’t go over well and crazy FMIL explodes and goes flying off the handle.
ALL day i get texts and phone calls from FMIL and FSIL saying how they won’t come to the wedding or the FSIL won’t be in the bridal party because of this, etc UNLESS the brother/best man gets put at their table, etc. And they sent my fiance even worse texts and phone calls. His mother said very cruel and evil things about him and myself (not directly, but along the lines if i am so upset i can give the engagement ring back, etc and other weird stuff).
They are literally black mailing me! It is crazy!! So how should I respond back? I needed all of yesterday to process this and cool off (mostly them needed to cool off).
My fiance and I aren’t changing our minds and now there is no way his brother will sit with them! The brother even tried to talk to them, but they wouldn’t listen. Very sad situation. I feel embarrassed for them! But I have no idea what to say or how to respond?
Any suggestions??? THANK YOU! Kinda stressed out now…
I can say i am blessed to have a wonderful loving family on my side, my fiance, great friends and most/all of his family.