Post # 1
One of my best friends asked me to be a bridesmaid in her wedding a few months ago. I VERY recently found out that I am pregnant. My problem is that my due date is 11 days before her wedding date. I know that it is difficult to predict how things are going to go or how I am going to feel at that time, but at this point I cannot imagine not being at my friend’s wedding.
We are going to pick out our bridesmaid dresses this weekend and I really wanted to keep the news of my pregnancy to ourselves until after the first trimester – we have not told anyone at this point. However given the situation of being a bridesmaid and choosing the dresses, do I share this with my friend now?
I really care what she may think and I know she thought there could be a possibility that I would be a pregnant bridesmaid but I think it will be a surprise that my due date is so close to her wedding date – it was for me! As much as I want to be a part of her wedding I don’t want her to feel like she has to not choose the bridesmaid dress she wants because of me and my situation.
Any advice would surely be appreciated!
Post # 3
I think giving her a heads up now would be best. Maybe she would rather have you as a guest instead of worrying up until the end if you will feel up to participating or so she could pick a style of dress for you that would work well with the other bridesmaids.
Post # 4
I am in the exact same situation as you except I’m the bride! My maid of honour is pregnant and due two weeks before my wedding. I say tell her. She will likley just be super happy for you. My girls are all wearing different styles of dresses so that wasn’t an issue for us – but even if it was I would have been more than happy to let her pick a different style so she would be comfortable.
Post # 5
congratulations!!!!! thats great!!
my guess is that your friend would not care that you were pregnant at her wedding (unless she is bridezilla-ish) but i think you should say something. to me, 11 days is cutting it pretty close! unless you are really early or REALLY late, it might be tough to commit to BM duties on the day of the ceremony. this way you have time to come up with a plan b?
Post # 6
I would talk to the bride and let her know before going dress shopping. I know you want to keep the news to yourself, but with a due date that close, you will either have a new newborn, be very pregnant (and prob uncomfortable), or not be there at all suddenly. Chances are if she knew this was a “possiblity” then she has already made some kind of arrangement for just in case.
Plus then at the shopping, you both can explain that you are trying to get pregnant, and guide the bms to a dress that will work for everyone, instead of outing you when you aren’t comfortable with it.
Post # 7
I would tell her but ask her to respect your wish to keep the pregnancy confidential for the time being.
I think it will be easier for her if you can speak with her ahead of the dress shopping trip, so that if she agrees with the idea of having different style dresses in the same fabric and/or color, it will appear to the rest of the bridal party that it was the bride’s idea.