Post # 1
Okay, so I’m trying to figure out how to make this work. My fiance is a musician, and he has full control over music in ceremony, which he wants to be all classical music. It’s never what I would have chosen for myself at my wedding as I aways imagined having people sing. However, I know how passionate he is about it and know how important it is to him so I have agreed to turn that over to him….with the exception of one song. It’s my favorite song ever, and I want it in there (it’s acoustic), and he has agreed to that.
Tricky part: I want him to be the one to play and sing it (he agrees to this also). In my attempt to figure out how to make this best work, I discovered apparently people hate this and say to not do it, because it makes guests uncomfortable, etc. I never had that opinion (people online are the negative ones—people I talk to, personally, love the idea). I talked to him about it, and he pretty much says “who cares what other people say, it’s what we want”. So, I guess we are still doing it. I just need help figuring out HOW!
We don’t want it to be the whole “serenade” type thing where I’m in a chair and he sings to me. And because he is playing the guitar too, it would have to be set up ahead of time, somewhat off stage for him to quickly go to, sing and come back. So if it’s already set up, it needs to be pretty out of the way, which mean he would be somewhat far away. Plus I don’t know how I feel about being left up there without him during our wedding ceremony. So then the question is…who does he sing to/toward? I don’t like the idea of his back being to me. But then his back to everybody else is kinda strange too. How on earth would you all make this work? Any opinions? I don’t really want it at the reception, cause I specifically want this song to be part of the ceremony. But also…where in the ceremony would you put it?
Any input you all could give would be greatly appreciated! I tend to overthink things, anyway, so I don’t know if I’m thinking too much about it. Sometimes trying to figure this out makes me wanna forget about it, but yet it’s so important for that song to be in it, and for it to be sung by him!
Post # 2
Well it’s going to be a little hard to picutre how “far away” he really is for the guitar to be out of the way, but either way i think it’s a great idea and glad you guys are still following through. I agree, he should not serenade you (maybe if it was the reception then yes). My vote’s for him to sing to everyone and you, it’s not like musicians stay in one place, I’d like to think he would turn and look at you, and then turn back… But I think he should stand “out of the way” and perhaps that means his back is to you but it’s only for a song? Better than you sitting and feeling awkward getting serenaded. My two cents! Good luck 🙂
Post # 3
SKTaylor: My husband (who is a choir teacher and also responsible for most of our music) sang a special song (technically to me) at our wedding. It was very tastefully done, and I had countless guests raving about it throughout the night. We also sang a duet, and it was one of the personal touches to our ceremony that people appreciated the most.
He did stand up there with me, but he sang out to everyone. I don’t know if you are having a pastor or if this is in a church (sorry if I missed where you said it), but typically the pastor can help guide you on where to put the songs. We sang our son before our vows. After the vows and all of that is where he sang his piece of music. Depending on the song, it could fit at either place. It’s hard not knowing the order of the ceremony, but I would put it before or after the vows (after the greeting and prayer if you have one, but before the rings or unity canlde if you’re having anything like that). I would also suggest he sing out to the crowd and you. I assume you will be watching him, so I don’t think it would look out of place for you to be standing up there alone (and/or with your wedding party if you have one).
I think it will look great as long as he isn’t singing it down the aisle or you are’t sitting in a chair getting serenaded.
Post # 4
kristen182: Thank you! He certainly isn’t serenading me…maybe that’s what other people did to where it was viewed as so uncomforable and awkward (cause that kinda would be). It’s in a church, somewhat large with several levels of stage, if that makes sense—So he would have to be set up a couple of levels down, out and over to keep his stuff out of the way.
megz06: It is good to know you’ve done it and was well received…and that he sang to everyone, not specifically to you, cause that’s kind of what we are going for. And my brother is a pastor so he will be officiating, I can talk to him about where to put it, but thanks for your advice!
I just really appreciate the feedback of “how” to do it and the reassurance it can be done without being awkward….even if that means he is a little far away and his back happens to be slightly to me. Thanks to both of you for the input!