Post # 1
I am getting married at the Bronx Zoo this summer. Most of our guests are traveling from out of town (Ohio and Florida mainly) and have never been to it. I once attended a wedding in Ohio wearing a $300 dress only to find out that guests were wearing jeans. Oops! (It was ok. My date was in the wedding and in a tux and I’d rather be overdressed than underdressed, anyhow.)
Even though we are not an overly fancy couple (he is wearing a black suit, not a tux, and I’m wearing a gorgeous but simple dress off the rack) I’d love to let guests know that the Zoo is actually quite lovely and to wear something special.
This is where we’ll be getting married: http://www.venuesonline.com/images/4/7664-large_86244-3PHOTOGRAPHERS_11.jpg Lovely, right?
I’ve attached a photo of the invites, which are not super formal either. See where I’m going here? I don’t want folks to dress in jeans and a tee and feel like a heel when everyone else is gussied up. The invites say “Dinner, dancing and lemurs to follow” b/c cocktail hour is with the lemurs and sea lions- yippee! But do you think I should include a note on attire in the invite? I put it on our website but who knows if people really visit those things?
I’d love your ideas on how to phrase it and where to put it. Basically, women in a cocktail dress or dressy summer dress will be fine but can certainly wear a ball gown if they want to! And guys in a suit won’t feel out of place. Thanks in advance!.
Post # 3
Oh, here is the photo in the link to “where we will be getting married” in case you don’t want to copy and paste:
Post # 4
I’d put it on your wedding website and let it spread by word of mouth as well. It worked well for us with our outdoor wedding (I had a cousin who wanted to wear jeans and his wife nearly killed him!).
Post # 5
I would put it after “Dinner, dancing, and lemurs to follow (so please wear your Sunday best!)” That sounds a little corny, but something similiar would let them know to dress up a little bit, but that it’s not full-on black tie. You can also elaborate further on the website you’re directing them to, if you wish.
Post # 6
IMO, the picture on the invite says it all (ps- adorable!) but u also have it on ur website, so I think that should be good. I wouldnot include anything with the invite unless u are already putting in some kind of info card, in which case something simple like “formal wear is encouraged, but not required” or “black tie optional” might be good too. And for good measure,sues some word of mouth to pass it along!
Post # 7
If you’re worried about it, I’d definitely suggest adding a note on the invite. You can add it to your website too, but I think more people are likely to see it on the invite. You can just say “Cocktail Attire” or something along those lines, at the bottom.
Post # 8
Thanks for the replies!
And I love these invites, too. If anyone is interested I got them from GoGoSnap on Etsy (the seller is very very sweet).
We bought 125 5×7 invites and 125 4×6 postcard RSVP’s for just over $300. And the quality is very nice (rounded edges and nice thick stock).
Just FYI – I’m in love with them!
Post # 9
@Miss Apricot: That’s actually a cute idea! I was going to say “get gussied up” but I think people will have no clue what that means (sooo a dress? costume? gown? wtf?).
Post # 10
i would definitely put something on the invites as well as the website. we said “Cocktail Attire” on the invitations, and then had a link specifying suits and cocktail dresses for ladies, as well as letting them know that the ceremony and reception was on grass and outdoors, so dress accordingly.
Post # 11
We put Dress: Cocktail on our invites for the same reason 🙂 I think a lot of people appreciate the heads up!
Post # 12
Hmm the fiance is saying that it will just cause more fuss.
I don’t know, I think “cocktail attire” on the invite with more info on the website should be sufficient. Maybe our parents and we will get more phone calls re: “so what should I wear then? Is XXXX ok?” but that’s ok.
I think it will be fun to have guests dressed up. The fiance thinks people should wear whatever they want so they are comfortable since it will be very hot outside…
Either way, cocktail dress is just a suggestion and direction, not a demand. Right?
Post # 13
Honestly I would find it a little condescending to be told how to dress. It would make me feel like the Bride and Groom have a problem with how I (or others) dress daily and felt so compelled to comment on it. like they think I or other guests might embarrass them!
I consider myself adult enough to know how to dress for a wedding. I usually use the invite as an indication of the formality of the event and it hasn’t failed me yet. If anyone is confused I am sure they will ask someone!
Post # 14
@j_jaye: Yeah, but some people aren’t that clever. It would be a shame to assume that people would figure out what they should wear, and have someone show up in jeans and a tshirt because they didn’t ask. I’ve seen it happen. People can be stupid.
Post # 15
@Sputnik: I understand that but should you possibly offend every other guest so that one person doesn’t show in jeans? And does it really matter what a guest wears? Shouldn’t the important thing be that they show up to witness the marriage and celebrate with the B&G?
Persoanally I didn’t even notice what most of the guests wore to my wedding and aside form our parents/siblings I can’t recall exactly what anyone wore and it has only been 5 months!
Post # 16
- Wedding: July 2012 - Muckenthaler Cultural Center
On our website we an included a “what do I wear?” section