(Closed) HELP!!!!!! I hate my dads girlfriend of 6 months….

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
2289 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

My opinion is to keep your opinion of her to yourself and respect your Dad’s choice of girlfriend. You don’t have to like her, just be polite. He’s paying for your wedding, so you really can’t ask him not to bring her.

I’m so sorry. I know how hard this is (and truly, she sounds like a peach *sarcasm*). But telling him that you don’t like her is only going to cause a rift between you and your Dad.

Post # 4
1474 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

It might be different if he weren’t paying for the entire wedding, but unless you think she’s going to go completely apeshit and do something super crazy at the wedding, I would just tough it out. <3 I’m sorry you have to deal with this.

Post # 5
4150 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Since he’s paying for the wedding, I wouldn’t say anything just to keep the peace. 

I had a similar situation with my mom and her ex-boyfriend.  My sister, Fiance, cousins, everyone hated him and my mom knew it.  Luckily they’ve broken up, but I made it very clear I did NOT want him at the wedding.  Fiance and I are paying for the wedding ourselves though so I felt like I had the choice to say so.

Here’s to hoping they break up before the wedding…?

Post # 6
10367 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

You don’t get to pick who your dad dates. His love life isn’t about you. If she’s his date, she’s his date. You will be way too busy at your wedding to deal with her, anyway – trust me. Just don’t invite her into the bridal suite and it’ll all be fine, I promise!!

Post # 7
13099 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2010

Unfortunately, we can’t dictate our friends’ and loved ones’ SOs.  I think it is rude to ask your dad to leave her at home or for you to express your dislike of her.

Post # 8
9029 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

If he is paying for the entire wedding then no you cannot ask him to leave his date at home.

Post # 9
973 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

unfortunately i think if you’re letting your dad pay for the wedding, you can’t tell him who he can and can’t bring. My parents divorced when I was young so i’ve been there….sorry 🙁

Post # 10
103 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

i agree with texasgirl

Post # 11
2104 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

He’s a grown up and can make his own choices about who he wants to date. I’m sorry she’s not your favorite person, but it doesn’t sound like she’s actually done anything TO you to try and hurt you. It’s absolutely not okay for you to ask him to foot the bill but then leave his significant other behind.

Post # 12
1944 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2009

I agree with others, you may not like his choice, but you should respect it. He’s paying for the wedding, I dont feel you can dictate who his date is. Also, maybe she came off wrong in the beginning bc she did try to hard but honestly it isn’t easy coming into situations like these with already made families and older children and being the new girl after a marriage or longterm relationship. I understand she may seem rude to you but do you ever think that some of that maybe due to the vibe she gets from you? If you “hate” this woman I’m sure she can feel the dislike and tension so why should she acknowledge you? Your dad obviously cares about her, so I would at least try to get along with her. Not inviting her to the wedding is not the way to go and probably would cause friction with your dad as well; why bother?

Post # 13
348 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I agree with what everyone has said. I was thinking you should just let him bring her as his date anyway, but then when I read that he is paying for it all, he should get to bring who he wants. She shouldn’t bother you throughout the day, just have her go right to the ceremony and not with your dad to take pictures before hand and don’t have her in your pictures because chances are she won’t make it in the long run if she is really as bad as you say so you wouldn’t want her in those memories.

Post # 14
46235 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Whether he is apying for the wedding or not, you do not get to choose his date.

What if your Dad was doing the same to you? Saying that he would pay for the wedding, but only if you married someone else? Wouldn’t you resent it? Even if you had the funds to pay for it yoursleves?

Time to grow up girl and let your Dad lead his own life. If it’s any consolation to you, people who behave like she does are often very insecure with low self-esteem.

Post # 15
2084 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 1993

Sorry, but as she hasn’t done anything truly henious (yet) you are stuck with her. She’s probably trying to impress you as she is desperate for your approval. Also, as your dad is paying, he is entitled to have her there. (Actually, I think I’d say this even if he wasn’t paying.)

Deep breaths. You’ll have other things to focus on during your big day. It’s not worth causing a war over this. Best of luck.

Post # 16
602 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Her behavior doesn’t seem over the top or like it will affect the wedding day greatly.  It sucks that you don’t care for her but I would bite my tongue and let it slide it doesn’t sound worth the drama especially in light of his generosity.

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