Post # 1
I been with my SO for almost 3 years; we have been living together for 2.5 years… Everything is great, he is a great guy, everyone loves him BUT he has not pop the question :s
He is 31 & I am
turning 30 this year… I
believe that he is the one… We have always talked about kids and marriage…. early this year, I mentioned that I wanted to have kids and we both agreed that we should start having kids by next year, however, I didnt hint or set any timeline about marriage because I beleive it should come from him! He knows that I will never have kids before being married.
Everyone keep asking us when we are getting married which is getting annoying and the desire to get married has been eating me alive since early this year…. How long is too long? I really dont want to pressure him because I will always wonder “did he really wanted to marry me?!?!?”
Thank you for your comments!
Post # 3
@anonymous007: some couples wait 8 or 10 years and some do it all in 1 year. There’s no right answer. While I really like your laid back approach to this, I think you can have a conversation to see what page he is on without pressuring him. Just find out if he is even thinking about marriage, what his goals are and what hesitations he may have. This is your life and it is only fair if you have a clue as to where it is going.
Post # 4
I think it’s time to sit down & have a direct conversation with him about your futures & timelines. It sounds as if, thus far, you have been indirect & hoping he’d pick up the ball & run with it.
After you have had a real discussion, you can make a decision about whether to stay in the relationship.
Post # 5
@anonymous007: I was with my ex for 5+ years and i thought he was the one and never poped the question. He’s 8 months younger then me.
Now the person I’m with which is my FI he’s 4 years older then me. I was with him for almost a year and a half. A month short of being a 1 1/2 and he poped the question.
So it all depends when they are ready.
I wish you the best of luck tho!
Post # 6
@anonymous007: I really dont want to pressure him because I will always wonder “did he really wanted to marry me?!?!?”
You asking about marriage or hinting at marriage, or even outright telling him when you want to get married… is something you SHOULD do. you need to be on the same page. if you don’t communicate about it because you are afraid of pressuring him, then you will never know how the other person feels or if the other person feels ready.
Imagine if a guy wanting to propose thought alone the same line as that. “I really want to marry her… but I’m afraid that if I do this whole big proposal, that she’ll only say yes because I pressured her into it.” Why is it okay for a guy to propose, but not okay for you to talk about it?
So… have a talk. Let him know when you’d ideally like to be married by. Don’t set a walk date or anything, but make sure he knows what life stage you are at and where you are ready to go to.
Post # 7
Thank you all for your response…
We have talked about marriage and it is clear that WE want to get married someday… Now is time to have “the talk” and find out his timeline!