- 3 years ago
So here’s the situation: I’m really close with my family on my mother’s side (aunts, uncles and cousins), but I’m not very close to my family on my father’s side. Both sides live in different countries; I see them about once every 2 years for a few days, the difference is that I spent lengthly amounts of time with my family on my mother’s side as a child and consequently feel much closer to them. Also, my FI has only met the family on my mother’s side, and no one on my father’s.
We’re having a small, intimate wedding, because of personal preferences and budget. My mother’s side includes very few people, but my father’s side alone (aunts, uncles and cousins) would double the current guest list. I know that it would be rude to invite one side and not the other, so we had originally decided to skip them all and just invite friends and immediate family.
But the more I think about it, the more the idea of not having my mother’s side at my wedding breaks my heart. I REALLY want to invite my mother’s side (aunts and cousins) but not my father’s side, but I am aware of the rudeness, and I’m turning to you to see if there is any way to pull off inviting on side and not the other.
Another issue is that FI’s family is tiny, so if we did invite all of our aunts, uncles and cousins on all sides, 80% of the guest list would be my family. That would be especially weird considering that FI’s mother is helping us with the costs, but my family isn’t.
In terms of hurt feelings, I don’t think that the family on my father’s side would mind, except that I think my paternal grandmother (who is invited regardless), and possibly my father, would be deeply offended.
Any advice would be very much appreciated!