- 7 years ago
I need some advice and thoughts big time. Some know my past history with my MIL and SIL, you can go back and read my posts, but just to just sum it all up, MIL and SIL were fine with me when we were dating then when we got engaged they couldn’t handle it, they have said some pretty hurtful things, treated me pretty badly, MIL and SIL would harass me and my DH, leaving us crazy VM and calling a million times, it even went as far that my SIL said she was going to swallow a bottle of pills because of me. His sister ruined my shower, she has said horrible things about me and my family along with her mother. And the last straw was at the RD when his mom and her made a massive scene, she was screaming and crying in the middle of dinner saying “ she is not number 1 anymore” while his mom was F bombing me, my family, my DH, she then almost punched me in my face, punched my FIL, we had to call the cops on them. It was a total Sh&t show. My DH and I together made the decision that they are not welcome in our life anymore, and our attempts at trying to make these issues go away will no longer be wasted on them. They just like drama and want to cause whatever problems they can between us. We have not spoken to either once since our wedding in Aug. His mother sent a few nasty emails while we were on our honeymoon and left a few nasty VM but we don’t respond and haven’t spoken.
His sister’s bday was in Oct, we sent a card; that was it. It was my birthday in Nov and neither his mother or his sister sent me a card, no big deal whatever, didn’t expect it.
For Christmas we did nothing for either of them, well I just got home and there was a package addressed to me and my DH from his sister. It was a gift box with cheese and crackers and such. No message or anything just that it was from her. I haven’t even told my DH about it yet, I know he is going to be torn up over it as I am, I just don’t know what to do or think. My DH and I have talked in great lengths about his Mom and his sister and we do know a lot of the issues with his Sister are because of his mother, she kind of controls her, though I feel like at 27 you can still stick up for right and wrong. We also agreed that we will NEVER have an open warm relationship with his mother, the things she said and did not only to me but my family, are unthinkable and not someone we want in our life, she has some serious issues. His sister on the other hand I do really believe if she could break away from the mother we could have a decent relationship with her but I don’t see it coming anytime soon. But now this gift from her…now what? I feel like even if we attempt to reach out to her everything from 5 months ago is going to come hashing back out and the drama will unfold again and I can’t deal with that, my DH and I are in a wonderful place right now and when his family is tangled it’s just not a fun place to be.
Do we just send a simple thank you card? Call her?