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I would talk to him about your concerns, but don't make it sound like you don't think he can hold his liquor. Say something like "Hey, I know we are going to do a little drinking, and I want us to have an amazing time, but I also want us both to remember this night. Should we set a limit?" Maybe suggest that the two of you only have a drink every hour, or a drink then a glass of punch, or something. That way he can enjoy coctails/beer/wine all day, but no one get out of control, and he doesn't feel like your taking a swipe at his ability to hold his own.
Hi JennyBryde! Do you think the monitoring/gentle advice giving would better come from a groomsmen on the big day? If you clued in one of the guys to the situation and asked him to try and stay on top of things? That could maybe get the weight off your shoulder.
I second the idea of getting a guy to do it. Otherwise, men have a way of getting their feelings hurt no matter what. If you dont go that route, maybe just make it about you...say something like "I really just don't want to get trashed at the wedding. I want to remember EVERY second. How about you?"
If you do get one of the guys to do it, make sure you pick one who is subtle and won't mess with him about it. Nobody wants to hear "I hear you drink like a girl, dude!" on their wedding day from their friend. :)
Maybe remind him about it being your wedding night, and special things *ahem* are supposed to happen on that night and that you want to be sure that he can remember it, or something along those lines.
4 or 5 drinks is kind of a lot (5 drinks is enough to make me crazy drunk, I never have more than 3). Surely if your FI doesn't drink a lot in general, he won't drink that much at the wedding. I mean, he probably won't even have time! if the cocktail hour isn't over and he's already thrown back 2 drinks, i'd just whisper in his ear all the sexy things you plan to do later, as long as he's not too drunk to participate :)
Get him really drunk a month or two before hand so he realizes how ridiculous he acts, even record it on your phone, and then in the morning tell him that there is no way you are letting him get like that for the wedding and how you want to enjoy your night without being embarrased.
How about having wine spritzers? They have half the alcohol and that's what I drink when attending a social event. That way I feel normal with a drink in my hand, but know I will not ever over indulge.
Make it clear to him to eat during the day too..and pace himself. Drinking nonstop due to stress or pressure from his buddies might cause any normal guy to maybe drink a little more.
I was going to ditto the wine spritzers. My craziest nights out mean like, 5 drinks in a 7 hour period. Yup, I don't metabolize alcohol. But I can drink water+ice with a lime slice so I don't feel too out of place (everybody assumes it's a vodka/tonic or something. It's my FAVORITE sober trick), or I do wine spritzers so I can feel festive and get the ever so slightest buzz so I feel like i'm at a party and i'm good to roll.
Thanks, Hive! These posts have all been insightful and helpful! I love the idea of having one of the guys be his good-boy-wingman, and he and I will be having a serious conversation at some point so that he knows how I feel about this. I also like the drink suggestions.
THANK YOU FOR THE SUPPORT! :)
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Hey, Hive...I need some suggestions. While I have no problem holding my liquor for the long haul, my manly man somehow, comically, cannot. He rarely drinks, but when he does and has more than...oh...4 or 5 drinks, he gets a little ridiculous.
Now...that being said...I love my fiance, and I want him to have a fabulous time at our wedding where we will be serving alcohol. But I want to have a good time too, and for me, having a good time does not include babysitting anyone or being the mommy.
How can I help him (without treading on his party toes) to monitor his drinking throughout the day? I don't want to embarass him or make him feel like he's a disappointment to me, so what do I say or do beforehand and on the day of to proactively take care of this.
(Honestly, this is like the ONE worry that I have about our wedding. Nothing else has me nervous...lol)
What say you, Hive?
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