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Ooo, this is a tough situation. I know this isn't the same situation, but we communicated to our single friends that "plus ones" will be reserved for serious dating, fiances/fiances and spouses -- due to budget reasons. Could you talk to your uncle about a similar arrangement?
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You can try telling your uncle that you don't have enough room maybe? I wish I could be more of a help. I have a few uninvited "guests" coming as well but there wasn't much I can do about it. You can talk to him if you can, or just stick her way in the back!
The type of person you are describing/picturing in your mind- do you seriously think your uncle would bring someone like that to your wedding? And how well do you know your uncle? Do you think he would bring just anybody to his nieces wedding?
I hope your mom and her brother don't make you lose energy on this one. Let your mom handle her brother. Because there are a lot of layers here that you shouldn't have to fret over IMO. You mom could very convincingly say 'you just separated- this isn't the time or place to display your dates to the family. Afterall this is my daughters wedding we are talking about'... or your mom could say 'could you just come on your own you just separated, just enjoy being with the family'. But this isn't for you to worry yourself over. Se if your mom can handle it?
I agree with Sparkles. And I can understand that you are upset. I'm not sure how close you were with your uncle's wife, but even so it's probably a shock. And it feels like bad kharma.
I think to add to what your mom could say to your uncle, how about that if he brigns a new, random date to your wedding, so shortly after his separation, it will be a real attention getter. IS it enough to distract people from remembering who the party is for anyway?
On the flip side, if she can't convince him with the power of the word, I think you should let it go. It's not worth you stressing over. You don't need those feelings surrounding your wedding. Just snub him in the receiving line (just joking).
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So, my uncle announced about two weeks ago that he and his third wife are separating. He called my mom two days ago and said he "needs to add a guest" since he wants to bring a date.
Now, I'm sure this woman is just lovely, but is it wrong that I do NOT want her at our wedding?
My uncle's position is that since his wife was going to be invited but now she obviously won't be coming, he should be allowed to bring a guest in her place.
My mom is afraid to say no, because she knows my grandmother will hassle her about it. I do NOT want this woman at the wedding. I have no idea who she is. For all I know she has teased up blonde hair and tattoos all over her body and her idea of dressing up is hooker heels and a fuschia mini skirt. Also, I think that our wedding is a completely inappropriate occasion for this. Am I being completely unreasonable?