Post # 1
So I have a question for you… as a bridesmaid/maid of honor, what did you do for your bride? I feel like I am trying to make a nice day/night for my friend, but the other bridesmaids are kind of opposing it. Background: 3 total bridesmaids and myself (Matron of honor). 2 are in their 20’s and then 1 is 14 (her FI’s sister).
The plans are to paint pottery for her kitchen, dinner and drinks afterwards. I had mentioned getting her gifts (lingerie for her honeymoon) and they said they thought the pottery would be her gift? It would be about $25 for ourselves and then splitting the $25 for the bride. The bride does get to keep all pottery pieces since they are for her kitchen. Then splitting paying for her dinner and drinks afterwards. To me it doesn’t seem lke very much money… did you guys get your bride lingerie if you were paying for other things?
I am also conflicted if I should still get the bride a gift because I am worried about showing up the other girls? What should I do? Thanks in advance for any advice!
Post # 2
- Wedding: September 2014 - Turf Valley
If that’s the type of event your bride wants, then I wouldn’t be concerned with how much it costs per person. 🙂
I haven’t heard of people bringing personal gifts for the bride at a bachelorette party. I’d save gifts for the shower or wedding.
Post # 3
I’ve gone along with whatever the Maid/Matron of Honor or bride wanted for the bachelorette party for 4 out of 5 weddings I’ve been a part of. One required a plane ticket and I draw the line at having to buy a plane ticket for a party. Sorry, not sorry. Anyways, the other bridesmaids and myself have never gotten gifts as part of the bachelorette aside from a sash or something to wear out. The point of the bachelorette party was to hang out with the bride and celebrate her upcoming marriage. The shower and wedding are where gifts are really only “needed”. However, for my cousin’s wedding the Maid/Matron of Honor and I bought her lingerie but gave it to her the night before the wedding.
TL;DR: I don’t think gifts are necessary. Just get her a sash/beads/tiera to wear out and pay for her drinks and stuff.
Post # 4
labradorlover: I think the lingerie gifts are overkill. It’s a bachelorette not a shower.
Post # 5
In my social circle, it’s common to get the lingerie/sex fun stuff for the bachelorette, since usually Grandma is at the shower and that just makes it 100% awkward.
That said, it’s also not a requirement.
As a Bridesmaid or Best Man, I got one bride some drinks and candles. Other people gave her lingerie and wine cups. I gave another bride her favorite liquor. She was also given lingerie and body lotion. Both times, not everyone gave gifts. No one complained, at least to me.
Post # 6
labradorlover: I really don’t think the gift is necessary, beyond the traditional bachlorette fair (sash, tiera, boa, etc.). At my bachlorette one girl showed up with a gift of undies and while it was so cute, it was a little weird opening the present in front of the other girls. Plus, I would never expect a 14 year-old to go by lingerie for her future SIL. I would have been mortified to do that at 14, 16, 18… hell, even now.
If you’d still like to get her a gift, give it to her alone, either before the party or after it. Don’t expect it of the other girls. Their prescence should be present enough.
Post # 7
Im a Maid/Matron of Honor and I just threw a bachelorette weekend for the bride (just this last weeknd!) We had 8 girls in a rented cabin for teh weekend. I made favors for all the girls (wine glasses with hangover survival kit stuff and mini liqours), we had a game where all the girls brought new panties and the bride had to guess who they were from (totally fun), and then we just kicked it and played games and ate/drank. People each brought food and drink to share so all that cost wasn’t on me, and we split the cost of the house. I paid for her dinner when we went out the second night, but after that we found cute boys to buy our drinks all night.