Post # 1
So the FMIL wants to write Mr. and Mrs. John Thompson on all of the invites. However, lots of our friends, as well as ourselves, prefer a more contempory approach, where the wife is not listed as necessarily encompassed within the husband’s name. For example, I’d like to do, instead:
Mr. John and Mrs. Jane Thompson
Is this a formal and acceptable alternative? How are other folks doing this? I’m happy to let the FMIL write it how she wants for her friends, but for the FI’s and my friends, we’d like to modernize it up.
Post # 3
That is not considered "acceptable." Although, my family and I are of the same feelings while my FILS were not. We went with Mr. and Mrs. John Smith for those who preferred and John and Jane Smith for those who did not.
Post # 4
The (old-fashioned, arguably lame) rule is that you never "seperate" the man’s first and last names. So, if you wanted, it’d be a little better to put Mrs. Jane and Mr. John Smith.
Post # 5
- Wedding: August 2018 - Oakland Manor
I wrote a post that probably won’t help you, but has a few good resources linked in it. http://www.weddingbee.com/2009/06/22/horrorifics/
I personally think that a woman shouldn’t have to be known by her husband’s name alone – and Emily Post agrees! She says it’s alright to address each half of the couple.
I also linked the crane blue book and a few helpful practical wedding posts in there.
Post # 6
- Wedding: July 2018 - Outdoor ceremony, banquet hall reception
I agree with the others. This doesn’t really work. It kinda makes the man look like he has no last name.
I like John and Jane Smith.
Mr. and Mrs. John and Jane Smith
Mrs. Jane Smith and Mr. John Smith (woman’s name is always first when listed separately).
Check out this post on A Practical Wedding for help:
I hope this helps! This is a tricky topic.
Post # 7
Thank you so very much! My FI and I just checked back, and the right answers were right here, and…moving on to the next task! Thanks!
Post # 8
I put both my mother’s name and my fmil’s name on my invitation. Then the calligrapher charged extra to include female names for addressing the invitations and I folded. 🙁 I just went the other way because of economy. That’s wrong, I know. It’s time to modernize it up. I should have started with my calligrapher who charged extra for that and threw a fit. 🙁